Magazine

A tired dad staring suspiciously at a glowing plastic baby monitor on a shelf

How the xiaoxia-baby webcam recorded my worst parenting moment

My mother-in-law firmly believes that baby monitors emit a mysterious frequency that turns infants into sleeper agents. My mate Dave, who treats fatherhood like a tactical military operation in hostile territory, insisted I needed a Β£300 dual-band Wi-Fi camera with...

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A tired dad holding a baby with a small bald spot on the back of its head.

Debugging The Baby Don't Be Bald Panic At Two In The Morning

It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday when I found myself hovering over the crib, shining my iPhone flashlight directly onto the back of my 11-month-old son's head. I was trying to measure the exact radius of the bald spot...

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Public restroom baby changing station with safety strap and black buckle visible

The Brutal Truth About That Public Baby Changing Station Strap

My mother-in-law told me to never let my kid's bare skin touch a public changing table. She suggested I do all diaper changes in the trunk of our sedan, like some sort of parking lot mobster. My favorite doom-scrolling app...

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Newborn in a safe going home outfit for baby strapped in a car seat.

Choosing the Right Going Home Outfit For Baby: A Dad's Warning

Dear Marcus (Version -11 Months), You're currently standing next to our Honda CR-V on Level 2 of the hospital parking garage, staring at a rigid plastic bucket with five straps that you're somehow supposed to secure your new daughter into....

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Taylor Big Baby guitar next to a ten-pound newborn in a Texas nursery

Why A Taylor Big Baby Fits My Nursery & My Ten-Pound Infant

Don't let your overly enthusiastic mother-in-law convince you to buy forty boxes of Size N diapers when your doctor says you're measuring three weeks ahead, y'all. I'm just gonna be real with you, that massive tower of pristine white Huggies...

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A vintage plush toy sitting safely on a high nursery shelf away from the crib

Why gifting a vintage november 24th beanie baby gives me hives

I watched my sister-in-law unearth a vacuum-sealed plastic bag at my baby shower, her eyes shining with that specific millennial nostalgia that usually precedes a terrible financial decision. She pulled out a dusty plush turkey from 1997. She proudly announced...

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A stressed mother holding a cup of coffee while looking at messy toys on a rug

The Viral Fidget Toy You Should Never Give Your Teething Infant

It was 2:14 PM on a Tuesday and I was wearing my husband Dave's faded college sweatshirt that smells faintly of old garlic, desperately sweeping my hand across our living room rug like a frantic human metal detector. I was...

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Stressed mom holding a baby while looking at a laptop and drinking coffee

When Katie And Bill Consult Lawyer About Luna's Baby Custody

I'm up to my elbows in matched toddler socksβ€”which is to say, exactly three pairs and forty singlesβ€”when I hear the TV blaring from the living room. My mom is visiting to help out, and she's got The Bold and...

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Toddler reaching for a green baby gem boxwood bush in a London garden

Why that "Baby Gem Boxwood" in Your Garden is a Toddler Trap

It was Tuesday, 4pm, and the sky over South London was that specific shade of bruised plum that threatens rain but only ever delivers a sort of aggressive, damp mist. I was staring at a landscaping quote from our landlord...

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