Magazine

Marcus holding an 11-month-old baby next to a smartphone showing a viral internet meme

The Fat Chinese Baby Meme and My Newborn Overfeeding Panic

I'm sitting in the dark at 2:14 AM, the harsh glow of my smartphone illuminating a fresh patch of spit-up on my gray hoodie. My 11-month-old son is asleep in his crib, breathing perfectly normally, while I'm deep-diving into the...

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Exhausted dad sitting in a dark nursery holding a baby monitor and looking confused

The Gone Baby Gone Cast Has Nothing on My 3 AM Detective Work

My mother swore he was just hungry, my hipster neighbor confidently diagnosed a "leap 6 sleep regression," and a random guy in my Portland coffee shop told me he was definitely sensing my own unresolved childhood trauma. Three totally different...

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Tired mom holding a coffee mug while looking at baby milestones on her phone

How A Weird Little Platypus Baby Cured My Milestone Anxiety

I was sitting on the freezing hexagonal tiles of our extremely cramped downstairs bathroom at 3:14 AM wearing a pair of Dave's gym shorts that I’d aggressively rolled up at the waist and a nursing tank covered in what I...

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Two toddlers pointing at a television screen showing a cartoon pig family

How Peppa Pig's New Arrival Fixed Our Sibling Transition Chaos

I was sitting cross-legged on a spectacularly stained rug, holding up a somewhat mangled stuffed rabbit and speaking in a high-pitched voice, trying to explain the concept of human gestation to my two-year-old twin daughters. They stared at me with...

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Tired dad looking at a laptop while baby plays with wooden toys on the floor

Why a Roblox Baby Search Terrified Me Out of Digital Parenting

It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, and my 11-month-old daughter was systematically attempting to pry the escape key off my mechanical keyboard while I desperately searched for a digital distraction. I just needed ten minutes of peace to drink...

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Exhausted mom drinking coffee while teaching the milk gesture using sign language for babies in a messy kitchen.

My Utterly Chaotic, Milk-Stained Guide To Sign Language For Babies

It’s 5:43 AM on a Tuesday in November. I'm wearing my husband Dave’s stained gray sweatpants and a maternity tank top that I’m pretty sure has been inside-out since Sunday. Maya is exactly eight months and two days old, and...

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Priya sitting in a messy nursery staring at high-contrast infant flashcards

The Myth of the Super Baby: What I Wish I Knew Six Months Ago

It's three in the morning. I'm sitting on the nursery rug, holding a high-contrast black-and-white flashcard of a geometric panda mere inches from my son's face. He is not looking at the panda. He is deeply, profoundly interested in the...

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Dad holding a very large and heavy 11-month-old baby in a sustainable organic cotton bodysuit

Raising a Jimbo Boss Baby: Firmware Updates for Heavy Infants

The blue line on the pediatrician’s monitor shot up into the top right quadrant like a server load graph during a DDoS attack. I adjusted my glasses. My wife shifted in her chair. Our 11-month-old son sat on the examination...

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Dad holding infant while looking at a smartphone screen in a dark nursery

My 3 AM Deep Dive Into the Island Boy Baby TikTok Drama

My phone brightness was turned down to one percent, but it still felt like staring into the sun. It was 3:17 AM. My 11-month-old son was asleep on my chest, entirely dead weight, snoring faintly with his mouth hanging open....

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