In Which Week Baby Gender is Developed: My Ultrasound Data Log
I was literally holding my phone up to the ultrasound monitor at week twelve, trying to overlay a digital protractor app onto the blurry gray static on the screen. "If the angle of the genital tubercle is greater than 30...
When your 4D ultrasound baby alien leaked on the family group chat
The ultrasound gel was freezing, and the sonographer whose name tag said Brenda was pushing the wand into my bladder with the force of a hydraulic press. We were at the 20-week anatomy scan. The monitor in the dark room...
When Can You Hear Baby Heartbeat Without Losing Your Mind
It's 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I'm lying flat on the cold hexagonal tiles of my master bathroom floor, wearing a pair of maternity leggings that are already too tight even though Iβm only nine weeks pregnant, and my...
Is There Actually an Accurate Baby Gender Predictor Out There
At fourteen weeks pregnant, I went to a family dinner, stopped for coffee the next morning, and saw my obstetrician that afternoon. My mother-in-law took one look at my chin breakouts and declared I was carrying a girl who was...
Baby Ultrasound Expectations vs. Reality: A Nervous Dad's Guide
The worst Tuesday of my entire life started in a strip mall between a discount vape shop and a dry cleaner that smelled aggressively like harsh chemicals. My wife, Sarah, was 28 weeks pregnant, and her sister had gifted us...
What Will My Baby Look Like (And Other Late Night Mysteries)
I was thirty-four weeks pregnant, sitting in the dark at two in the morning, paying a sketchy app five dollars to merge my face with my husband's. The result loaded on my phone screen and I just stared at it....
That viral stone baby video is lying to you about pregnancy
It's two in the morning and I'm watching my toddler practice his mixed martial arts kicks in his sleep while my phone screen illuminates the dark. The algorithm, in its infinite wisdom, has decided that what a tired mother really...
when can u find out babys gender (and the bathroom floor incident)
I was sitting on the cold hexagonal tiles of our half-bathroom at exactly 8:14 PM on a Tuesday, wearing Daveβs stained college sweatpants, aggressively squeezing my own index finger while trying not to pass out. There was blood on the...
The 4D Strip Mall Ultrasound Panic We Absolutely Did Not Need
The room smelled aggressively like vanilla plug-in air fresheners and shared a drywall boundary with a discount mattress store. I was sitting in a faux-leather theater recliner in the Portland suburbs, sweating through my t-shirt, while a woman who introduced...