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Surviving The Baby Boomer Age With A Toddler In Your House
I brought my aging parents to live with us in Chicago last winter. Don't attempt to merge decades of generational trauma and a teething toddler by just smiling and pretending you've unlimited emotional bandwidth. It was a Tuesday when I...
Dear Past Sarah: The Local Kids Store Is A Complete Trap
It's Tuesday, 10:45 AM, and you're currently sweating through your favorite grey Madewell tee while standing in the middle of that aggressively aesthetic boutique downtown. Your four-year-old, Leo, is lying starfish-style on the polished concrete floor, screaming something that sounds...
The Great Bread Deception: Meeting A Baby Swan (And Surviving)
It's a crisp Tuesday morning at St James's Park, and an elderly gentleman in a tweed flat cap is hurling massive, doughy chunks of supermarket sliced white bread into the water. A fluffy grey cygnet—which I've just spent ten minutes...
Dear Me: The Truth About Giving A Baby Ruth Candy Bar To A Toddler
October 31st, 11:30 PM. The kid is finally asleep. You're sitting on the living room floor surrounded by a mountain of plastic pumpkin loot. You unwrap a baby ruth candy bar. You look at it. You think about how your...
Screen Time Reality: A Mom's Take On The Little Baby Bum Craze
When my oldest was born, my mom flat-out told me that looking at a screen before age two would permanently short-circuit his brain. My pediatrician shrugged at our six-month checkup and said fifteen minutes of a cartoon so I could...
The Great Naked Baby Rebellion: Surviving Twin Toddler Nudity
It's 7:14 AM, and the unmistakable sound of bare feet slapping against the cold hardwood floor echoes down the hallway. I'm standing near the radiator holding a pair of tiny corduroy trousers that cost more than my first car, watching...
Surviving the Lava Monster Phase: A Dad's Take on Baby Moana
The haptic feedback on my Apple Watch woke me from a sleep-deprived trance at exactly 3:14 PM on a Saturday. It was a decibel warning. My living room had just surpassed 90 decibels, which my watch helpfully noted could cause...
Confessions of a Clueless Runner: The Truth About Baby Joggers
I'm three miles deep into a caliche dirt road in rural Texas, sweat pooling in places I didn't know could sweat, pushing a thirty-dollar plastic umbrella stroller that sounds like a shopping cart with a square wheel. My oldest son,...
That Night a Baby Hazel App Cost Me Nine Bucks and Total Sanity
I was elbow-deep in printing shipping labels for my Etsy shop at ten o'clock on a Tuesday night, entirely convinced my four-year-old was dead asleep in his room, when my Apple watch buzzed with an $8.99 charge from the App...