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The Stork Baby Myth and the Brutal Reality of Postpartum
My mother-in-law walked into my Chicago apartment holding a massive stuffed white bird with a little cloth bundle in its beak. She placed it right next to the bassinet, beaming with that specific kind of grandmotherly pride. I just stared...
The Messy Truth About Feeding Sugar Baby Melons to Infants
I'm currently staring at my kitchen counter, which looks exactly like a crime scene. I've a paring knife in one hand, half of a tiny, bowling-ball-sized watermelon in the other, and sticky pink juice running all the way down to...
The unglamorous truth of raising a super diaper baby
The digital clock on my nightstand said 2:14 AM, and the wind off Lake Michigan was rattling our bedroom windows. My husband was standing near the door holding a tub of wet wipes like he was waiting for someone to...
The 45-Minute Fakeout: Surviving The Twilight Sleep Phase
It was 7:42 PM on a Tuesday. I know this because the microwave clock was glaring at me in neon green, mocking the mug of coffee I had reheated four times since noon and still hadn't taken a single sip...
The 2 AM Fever Breakdown: Honest Advice on Dosage and Spit-Ups
The biggest lie the parenting industry sells us is that the second your kid feels warm to the touch, you need to panic, strip them down, and immediately pump them full of fever reducers. I'm standing here in my laundry...
What The Lil Durk Baby Mama Drama Taught Me About Co-Parenting
My mom sat me down at the kitchen table over a plate of lukewarm eggs and told me to just smile and wave politely at my husband's ex during drop-offs, like I was the grand marshal of a small-town parade....
What The Lana Rhoades Baby Drama Taught Me About Online Privacy
I was sitting on the cold hexagon tiles of my downstairs bathroom at 2:14 AM, the blue light of my phone illuminating a weird stain on my sweatpants that I was aggressively pretending was just yogurt. Leo was four months...
Kat Timpf's Birth Story Proves We Can't Control Everything
I was sitting on the floor of our Portland apartment, watching my 11-month-old systematically try to dismantle the baseboards with his two bottom teeth, when I decided to permanently delete the color-coded Notion database I had built for his birth....
Why the Kali Uchis Baby Approach Actually Works for Normal Moms
There I was, wedged between the humming dryer and a towering basket of unfolded towels at 2:32 AM, bouncing a highly agitated four-month-old on my hip while desperately scrolling my phone with my thumb just to stay awake. Out here...