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Why Wooden Toys for a 1-Year-Old Might Actually Save Your Sanity
It's 5:42 am on a Tuesday, and I'm currently staring at a plastic farm animal that has been singing the same off-key rendition of 'Old MacDonald' for fourteen consecutive minutes. Maya has her tiny foot firmly planted on the cow...
Why Your Plastic Baby Rattle Might Be A Terrible Idea
My mother-in-law brought over a solid silver shaker straight from a jeweler in Delhi. A woman in my mom group swore by a terrifying plastic monstrosity that flashed strobe lights and played generic techno beats. My doctor looked at both...
The newborn rattle timeline from potato stage to blunt force trauma
I was standing in the kitchen at 4am, holding a plastic object that resembled a neon torture device, trying to work out why my three-week-old daughters were actively ignoring it. It was a Tuesday. Or possibly a Thursday. Time becomes...
What I wish I knew about the holz babyrassel as a first toy
I was sitting on my living room floor at three in the morning, staring at a battery-operated plastic cow that was playing a distorted, low-battery version of a nursery rhyme on a terrifying loop. My son Dev was screaming. The...
Dear Marcus: Stop Buying Loud Plastic Toys and Read This
Dear Marcus of exactly six months ago, It's 3:14 AM on a Tuesday. You're standing in the dark hallway of your Portland bungalow, clutching a lukewarm bottle of formula, staring at a flashing plastic boombox toy that's aggressively singing "I'M...
Why Most Infant Play Mats Are A Trap (And What Actually Works)
I was on my hands and knees in the middle of my living room, frantically trying to scrub curdled breastmilk out of a felt lionβs mane with a single dry baby wipe, while my three-month-old screamed like I was actively...
Why The Wrong Infant Play Mat Will Ruin Your Tuesday Afternoon
It was 2:14 PM on a particularly bleak, rain-lashed London Tuesday, and a plastic, primary-coloured toucan was aggressively singing a distorted, tinny version of βLa Cucarachaβ while swinging precisely three inches above my daughterβs nose. I was sitting on the...
Surviving the Night with a Baby Rassel: Why Simple Toys Win
The digital clock on the microwave glared at me in aggressive, glowing red numbers: 3:14 AM. I was standing barefoot in a puddle of something unidentifiable (let's optimistically call it water) while holding a screaming two-year-old who was currently producing...
Why I Was Completely Wrong About Rasseln FΓΌr Babys As A New Dad
It was Tuesday at roughly 4:12 PM, and my living room looked like a warehouse explosion at a brightly colored plastics factory. I was sitting on the rug holding a neon green plastic hippo. I shook it. It emitted a...