Magazine

Exhausted British twin dad holding a wooden baby gym in a messy living room

How to Be a Rich Baby Daddy Without Actually Having Any Money

I'm standing in a painfully well-lit Marylebone baby boutique at eleven in the morning on a Tuesday, holding a Β£400 self-rocking bassinet, while one of my two-year-old twins actively attempts to eat a display shoe. The sales assistant is looking...

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Exhausted mom staring at a budget spreadsheet on her laptop while drinking coffee.

Dear Past Me: Surviving The Ramsey Baby Steps With Kids

Dear Sarah from last October, It's 11:42 PM on a Tuesday and you're sitting on the sticky kitchen linoleum right in front of the dishwasher. You're wearing those black yoga pants with the dried yogurt stain on the left knee,...

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Tired dad holding a crying 11-month-old baby while looking at a laptop screen

Troubleshooting The Baby Come Back Phase Without Losing Your Mind

2:14 PM. Portland is doing that misty drizzle thing outside where it's not quite raining but you still get entirely wet. I've stepped exactly 3.4 feet away from the playmat to grab my lukewarm coffee from the side table. I...

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A dad holding two muddy toddlers wearing mixed organic and fast fashion basics

The Truth About Old Navy Baby Clothes and Toddler Mud

Don't, under any circumstances, dress two newly-mobile toddlers in matching cream linen rompers for a casual stroll through a damp London park in November. I did this exactly once, under the tragic, sleep-deprived delusion that I could maintain my pre-kids...

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An 11 month old baby boy stuck in the corner of a living room

Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner: A Dad's Guide To The Reverse Gear

It was exactly 6:14 PM, the thermostat was holding steady at 68.5 degrees, and I was watching my 11-month-old son slowly reverse himself into the precise 90-degree angle where the drywall meets the glass sliding door. He looked like a...

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Exhausted dad looking at his phone in a dark room while a new born baby sleeps in a bassinet.

Total System Crash: Troubleshooting Our New Born Baby on Night Four

It’s 3:14 AM on our fourth night home, and I'm standing over the bassinet holding my phone flashlight like an idiot, trying to count the chest rises of a 7-pound human. My wife is asleep for the first time in...

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Tired dad holding twin baby girls while trying to read a parenting book

My Fictional Gangster Baby Daddy and the Reality of Co-Parenting

When we first found out we were having twins, the unsolicited advice arrived with the speed and aggression of a flock of London pigeons spotting a dropped chip. Three different people gave me entirely contradictory instructions on how to handle...

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A dusty 90s plush bear sitting next to a modern organic silicone baby teether

The Truth About The Most Expensive Beanie Babies

I'm sitting on the concrete floor of my parents' garage in the Chicago suburbs, sneezing thirty years of dust out of my nose. In front of me is a massive plastic storage bin labeled with my name and the phrase...

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Mom adjusting the straps on a newborn with low muscle tone in a car seat

Stop Saying Mongoloid Baby: Real Talk About Down Syndrome

I was sweating straight through my maternity leggings in the back of our Honda Odyssey, crying so hard I couldn’t see the buckles. It was August in rural Texas, which is basically the surface of the sun, and we hadn’t...

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