Magazine

A scattered pile of wooden sorting blocks on a living room rug

My Desperate Search for "Spielzeug fΓΌr 1 JΓ€hrige" (Toys)

Yesterday at 5:14 AM, I staggered into the living room to grab a burp cloth and stepped directly onto a plastic cow that immediately began mooing "Old MacDonald" in a haunting, battery-depleted baritone. My 11-month-old daughter, sitting in her playpen,...

Read more

Sarah holding a massive iced coffee looking stressed inside a brightly lit infant store aisle.

Losing My Mind Inside Infant Stores (And What You Actually Need)

My mother-in-law cornered me at my own baby shower, pointed at my seven-month belly, and told me I needed to buy absolutely everything brand new or the baby would contract some kind of Victorian wasting disease. Twenty minutes later, my...

Read more

A frustrated mom adjusting the straps on a rear-facing infant car seat.

The Brutal Truth About Car Seats For Babies And Surviving The Setup

It was late August in Texas, meaning the hospital parking lot felt like the inside of a preheated oven. My husband Dave was violently yanking a seatbelt through a gray plastic base, sweating completely through his shirt, while the discharge...

Read more

Pediatric nurse Priya checking the harness tension on a rear-facing baby car seat

The freezing truth about strapping infants into baby car seats

It's February in Chicago, the wind chill is somewhere around negative twelve, and I'm standing in the concrete wind tunnel of Northwestern Memorial's parking garage at two in the morning. My husband has his phone flashlight clenched between his teeth....

Read more

A dad looking exhausted in a brightly lit toy store aisle.

A Letter to Myself: What I Wish I Knew Before Entering the Toy Store

Dear Tom from exactly six months ago, You're currently standing in the middle of aisle four of a massive, warehouse-style toy store just off the M25, sweating profusely into your supposedly breathable cotton t-shirt while the twins double-team a meltdown...

Read more

Mint green infant silicone squirrel teether on a wooden table next to a pacifier clip.

Why Infant Silicone Replaced Every Plastic Bowl In My House

I was sitting on my kitchen floor at two in the morning, staring at a warped plastic breast pump flange floating in a pot of boiling water. It had melted just enough to look like modern art. The smell of...

Read more

A dad holding an 11-month-old baby dressed in layered organic winter clothes.

Debugging Baby Winter Temperature: A Dad’s Layering Logic

We were twenty-two minutes into the deployment phase of leaving the house, standing in our freezing Portland driveway, when the entire system crashed. I had just spent a quarter of an hour wrestling my 11-month-old son into a heavily insulated,...

Read more

Toddler girl wearing organic cotton pants crawling over gravel without scraping her knees

Why I Exclusively Buy Boys Cargo Pants for My Feral Twin Girls

My mother cheerfully informed me that little girls should be dressed exclusively in floral smocked dresses, which is a lovely sentiment if your children sit perfectly still on a velvet cushion playing the harp. My extremely intense NCT group leader...

Read more

Mother adjusting the footboard on a colorful baby activity center in a living room

What Nobody Tells You About That Baby Activity Center

I walked into my mother-in-law's house last Thanksgiving and caught her trying to wedge my four-month-old into a plastic rolling walker that looked like a relic from 1996. I pulled him out of that dusty death trap so fast I...

Read more