The Honest Truth About The Baby Zebra Nursery Trend
I was four days past my due date with my oldest, sweating through a maternity tank top in the middle of a Texas July, rolling a color called "Whispering Oatmeal" onto his nursery walls. I spent months curating this incredibly...
Why the Viral Baby Three Collectibles Are a Nightmare for Parents
I was elbow-deep in laundry on a Tuesday when the silence hit. Any mom of three under five knows that dead silence in the playroom isn't a blessing, it's a threat. I dropped a half-folded organic sleep sack and sprinted...
The Messy Truth About That Cry Baby Doll You're Thinking of Buying
Dear Jess from six months ago. You're currently standing in the middle of Target, heavily pregnant with number three, staring at a wall of wide-eyed, plastic toys in fuzzy animal onesies while convincing yourself this is the magic bullet for...
Unboxing baby dolls that look real: A first-time dad's survival guide
The box cutter sliced through the packing tape at exactly 7:42 PM on a Tuesday. I peeled back the layers of tissue paper, fully expecting a wooden puzzle or maybe some harmless stacking blocks from my wife's aunt. Instead, I...
Why Most "Educational" Toys Are Just Overpriced Plastic
I'm currently staring down a plastic monstrosity that speaks three languages, flashes like a discount Vegas casino, and cost my mother-in-law forty-five dollars. It has a giant sticker on the box screaming that it'll teach my baby geometry, and let...
Keeping your real newborn alive during the plastic toy craze
My mother-in-law told me to rub mustard oil in the baby's ears to prevent winter infections. My old charge nurse swore I had to wake him every two hours on the dot or his blood sugar would tank. The barista...
The Truth About The Most Expensive Beanie Babies
I'm sitting on the concrete floor of my parents' garage in the Chicago suburbs, sneezing thirty years of dust out of my nose. In front of me is a massive plastic storage bin labeled with my name and the phrase...
Is Rosemary Safe for Babies? A Mom's Honest Story
I was staring at a twenty-four dollar bottle of "all-natural botanical" baby massage oil in my kitchen trash can at two in the morning while my oldest son, Beau, screamed bloody murder in the other room. His tiny back was...
Note to Self About That Backyard Bunny Incident We Barely Survived
Dear Priya from last April. You're currently standing frozen in the damp Chicago grass, holding a weed whacker in one hand and a half-eaten string cheese in the other. Your toddler is strapped to your back in the ergonomic carrier,...