Magazine

Stressed dad looking at a car seat manual in the driveway.

My Bamby Baby Store Wake-Up Call: Why I Stopped Hacking Gear

I was wedged upside down in the backseat of my Subaru Outback, rain streaking the windows, sweating through a t-shirt in forty-degree Portland weather. My phone was propped precariously on the center console, playing a grainy YouTube tutorial at 1.5x...

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Dashboard monitor showing a sleeping infant in a rear facing car seat

The Truth About Buying a Baby Cam Car Monitor for Your Sanity

We were somewhere around mile marker 240 on Interstate 35, completely surrounded by pitch-black Texas cattle country, when the panic hit me. Jackson was three months old, my first baby, and he had been screaming for forty-five minutes straight before...

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A folded stack of baby blankets on a wooden nursery dresser next to a half-empty coffee mug

Dear Past Priya: The Blanket Size Guide You Should Have Read

You're sitting on the floor of the nursery right now, surrounded by a mountain of folded pastel fabric from the baby shower, crying over a half-eaten samosa. It's 3 AM in Chicago, you're eight months pregnant, and you're trying to...

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Marcus looking stressed holding a tiny gold baby bracelet next to a sleeping infant

The 2 AM Bangle Incident: Cultural Traditions Vs. My Kid's Face

The acoustic anomaly started at exactly 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, cutting through the white noise machine like a glitch in the audio matrix. It was a high-frequency, metallic clink-jingle coming from the baby monitor. I stared at the night...

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A frustrated dad looking at a smartphone while twins play with wooden toys

The 'Baby Akira Onlyfans' Search Hazard: A Parental Warning

My mother thinks an unlocked iPad is a perfectly acceptable babysitter (she frequently reminds me that she left me in front of the television for the entirety of the 1990s and I turned out completely fine, which is debatable). The...

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A messy nursery with a spider plant hanging far out of reach from a toddler.

Surviving Nursery Greenery: The Truth About Baby Plants

It was 10:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was wearing Dave’s oversized college hoodieβ€”the gray one that has had a suspicious, permanent yogurt stain on the left cuff since 2019. My coffee had been reheated in the microwave four...

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Vintage 90s plush toys sitting on a messy nursery floor next to a spilled cup of coffee.

Why a February 18 Beanie Baby almost ruined my weekend

I was standing in my laundry room at 2 AM wearing my husband Dave's faded Georgetown sweatpants and a nursing bra that had definitely seen better days, violently hacking at the door of our dryer with a butter knife. The...

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Marcus looking stressed while trying to align a strip of floral baby girl wallpaper

The Great Baby Girl Wallpaper Debug: A Dad's Guide to Nursery Decor

I'm standing on a step stool at 11 PM with a plastic putty knife in my hand, frantically trying to scrape a semi-congealed layer of industrial adhesive off the drywall before it permanently bonds. My wife Sarah is standing in...

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Tired dad trying to figure out how to tie a five-metre stretchy baby wrap sling in a car park.

Surviving the Five-Metre Fabric Trap of the Baby Wrap Sling

It was a drizzly Tuesday in the Lewisham Sainsbury's car park when I finally accepted defeat. I was standing next to the open boot of our Skoda, holding what appeared to be an endless, terrifyingly long ribbon of jersey cotton....

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