How I completely debugged our library of baby books for girls
It's 2:14 AM on a Tuesday. I'm sitting cross-legged on the nursery floor, surrounded by a mountain of glossy cardboard. My wife, Sarah, is blissfully asleep down the hall, and our 11-month-old daughter is currently executing a sleep cycle that...
Why We Tore Down The Nursery Walls At 3 AM For Blue Paper
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was staring at a wall painted a shade the DIY shop had optimistically called 'Sunshine Morning' but which, in the harsh glow of a dimmable nightlight, looked more like 'Aggressive Custard'....
What to Write in a Baby Shower Book When You Are Out of Ideas
Before my wifeβs best friend had her first child, I found myself backed into a corner of her cramped London flat, holding a pristine copy of The Very Hungry Caterpillar and a biro that was rapidly running out of ink....
Surviving the great weaning transition of 2022
It was precisely 11:14 am on a Tuesday, and I was standing on a dining chair trying to scrape what appeared to be organic beige cement off the kitchen ceiling with a silicone spatula. The twins were exactly six months...
Why your newborn sounds like a tiny restless barnyard animal
It's three in the morning and you're hovering over the bassinet with your phone flashlight half-covered by your thumb. You're doing this because the tiny human you birthed is making noises that belong in a barnyard. It's a mix of...
My Chaotic Baby Gemini Hiking Story On The Ashlyn Peaks Trail
Whatever you do, please learn from my colossal screw-up and avoid attempting the south ridge trail at Ashlyn Peaks with a six-month-old Gemini strapped to your chest while wearing non-breathable Lululemon knock-offs, because it'll end in chafing and tears. Mostly...
Finding a CD Baby Coupon Code and Debugging Nursery Audio
My mother-in-law insisted we needed a booming surround-sound system pumping classical Mozart into the crib to guarantee our daughter would eventually understand advanced calculus. My lead engineer at work, who approaches parenting like a server migration, swore by absolute, vacuum-sealed...
Realistic Baby Puree Recipes (And My Exploding Blender Disaster)
It was 4:12 PM on a Tuesday, and I was standing on a dining chair scraping aggressively orange sweet potato mush off my kitchen ceiling with a spatula. I was wearing my favorite cream-colored cashmere blend sweaterβbecause apparently, sleep deprivation...
When Do Dogs Lose Their Baby Teeth? A Twin Dad's Survival Guide
I stepped on it barefoot at exactly six in the morning. It was sharp, cold, and entirely unyielding, which naturally led me to assume I had discovered yet another rogue piece of plastic from the twins' supposedly tidied toy box....