Magazine
Twins and the absurd reality of baby elephant weight
In the suffocatingly warm waiting room of our local NHS clinic, whilst desperately trying to balance a screaming twin on each knee, I received three entirely contradictory pieces of advice about infant growth within a single ten-minute span. Our health...
Let's talk about the baby einstein aquarium and infant sleep
My mother-in-law sat at my kitchen island and told me those glowing plastic fish were the only reason my husband ever slept through the night in the early nineties. My doctor looked at my meticulously tracked sleep logs, sighed, and...
When Your Baby's Face is Red and Peeling: My Eczema Survival Story
I was sitting in my minivan in the HEB parking lot, crying over a steering wheel covered in crushed Cheerios, because the cashier had just asked me why I let my three-month-old get a severe sunburn in February. I hadn't,...
Spotting Baby Ear Infection Symptoms In The Middle Of The Night
It was 2:14 AM and I was standing in the dark hallway swaying like a zombie while my second kid, Wyatt, aggressively yanked on his left earlobe and screamed into my collarbone. I remember staring at the shadow of the...
How to prevent a baby driver death and beat parenting autopilot
It was 2017, I was wearing these horrific grey maternity leggings that I refused to throw away even though Maya was already ten months old, and I was sitting at a red light on 4th Avenue with iced coffee literally...
Why the Baby Driver Actor Made Me Rethink Infant Safety
Dear Marcus from six months ago. I know exactly what you're doing right now. It's 3 AM in our Portland living room. You've logged exactly 3.4 hours of heavily fragmented sleep, and you're currently acting as a human mattress for...
What the Baby Dory Method Teaches Us About Resilient Kids
I'm sitting on my living room floor in Chicago watching a blue animated tang fish bump into a coral reef for the fortieth time today. My toddler is mesmerized by the screen. Half the moms in my playgroup think this...
Surviving the Unexplainable Evening Crying Phase
My Apple Watch tapped my wrist at exactly 5:14 PM to let me know the ambient noise level in my living room had reached 95 decibels, a volume it cheerfully warned could cause temporary hearing loss. I didn't need the...
3AM Screaming, K-Pop Fixes, And Why Babies Cry
"Leave them, it exercises their lungs," my mother-in-law declared over Sunday roast, waving a forkful of parsnip in the general direction of the nursery. "If you don't respond within thirty seconds, they'll develop crippling attachment trauma," our NHS health visitor...