Magazine
Why Raising A Little Tiger Shouldn't Mean Losing Your Mind
The biggest lie they tell us about raising successful kids is that you've to start treating them like miniature Harvard applicants the second they crown. I remember sitting on my hand-me-down couch with my oldest baby, heavily caffeinated and crying...
How to Handle a Tick Bite on Your Baby Without Losing Your Mind
I was elbows deep in lukewarm bathwater trying to scrub what I thought was a stubborn piece of dried Texas dirt out from behind my four-month-old’s left ear. My oldest was running around the bathroom completely naked, loudly singing a...
Baby This is Keke Palmer: How a Pop Culture Podcast Saved My Sanity
It was 2:14 PM on a Tuesday in late October, four years ago when Leo was just a tiny, furious newborn. I was sitting in the driver’s seat of my Honda CR-V in the Target parking lot. I was wearing...
The Search Box Betrayal: Telugu Cinema and My Infant's Brain
It was 3:14 AM, the exact hour my optimism usually crashes and my brain reverts to safe mode. The baby was executing a flawless, high-decibel infinite loop of crying because of a newly erupting lateral incisor. I was bouncing him...
The messy truth about the infant teething timeline
I spent five years in pediatric triage, and if I had a dollar for every time a parent told me their infant's 103-degree fever and explosive diarrhea was just teething, I could pay cash for my kid's future orthodontics. You're...
When baby tears sims 4 complaints broke me during a 3am twin meltdown
It was 3:14 in the morning, and I was illuminated entirely by the sickly blue glow of my phone screen while Twin A writhed against my shoulder like a damp, furious sack of potatoes. Twin B was mercifully unconscious in...
The Truth About Newborn Crying and Why You Don't See Tears Yet
It was 2:14 AM, and my oldest son Jackson—who is my personal cautionary tale for literally every parenting mistake a human can make—was doing this high-pitched pterodactyl shriek that vibrated directly in my molars. I was shining my iPhone flashlight...
Spiders, toddlers, and the absolute chaos of eight-legged pets
My brother-in-law told me a spiderling is the perfect first pet because it teaches quiet observation. My son's preschool teacher said bringing an arachnid into a house with a toddler is basically child endangerment. The guy at the local reptile...
The terrifying physics of your first garden baby swing setup
I'm standing in our damp, aggressively overgrown London garden, holding twenty feet of braided nylon rope and staring at a branch on our neighbor's encroaching oak tree, while Florence—who's supposed to be sitting quietly on a blanket—attempts to eat a...