When Can You Finally Stop Burping Your Baby? A Mom's Honest Story
I remember sitting in the dark in the rocking chair that squeaked every time I leaned back, aggressively patting my oldest son's back like I was trying to dislodge a stuck vending machine snack. It was probably 3:14 AM on...
Dear Past Marcus: Those Aren't Pale Ants, They're Baby Termites
Dear Marcus of exactly six months ago: Put down the flashlight. That tiny, pale, squirming thing you're currently poking with a cotton swab at 2:14 AM on the bathroom tile is not an albino ant. It's a baby termite. Don't...
The 3AM Savior: Decoding Baby Blue Daniel Caesar Lyrics
There's a very specific type of despair that sets in around 3:14 AM when one twin is screaming because the shadows on the wall are looking at her funny, and the other is methodically attempting to ingest the cardboard spine...
The Truth About Mebie Baby: A Letter to My Sleep-Deprived Self
Dear Tom from six months ago, You're hiding in the downstairs loo right now, aren't you? You've got one foot wedged against the door to keep the twins out, you're covered in something sticky that you pray is just mashed...
Surviving the Hype: Baby Quilt Patterns and Actual Safe Sleep
It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was eight months pregnant with Maya, sobbing over a jammed bobbin on a borrowed Singer sewing machine. I was wearing maternity leggings that definitely had a hole in the crotch, my...
Debugging The Baby Beanie: My Thermal Miscalculations As A Dad
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, roughly two weeks after we brought our son home, and I was staring at the Nanit monitor on my nightstand like it was a mission-critical server dashboard. The camera feed showed my kid...
Why I Traded My Spine for a Cheap Carrier (And What I Buy Now)
We were halfway up Enchanted Rock in the dead of a Texas July, and I was absolutely convinced my spine was going to snap in two. My oldest—bless his heart, he was the guinea pig for literally every parenting mistake...
Demolishing the First Food Myth: Why You Need A Pear Baby
I was standing in the baby food aisle staring at a nine-dollar pouch of organic Peruvian maca root and wild blueberry puree when I realized we had collectively lost our minds. My six-month-old was sitting in the shopping cart, happily...
Dear Past Me: The Messy Truth About Having a Lip Tie Baby
Dear Sarah of exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting on the undersized, aggressively cheerful yellow chair in Dr. Vance’s pediatric dental waiting room. It’s a Tuesday. You're wearing those black leggings that have a hole near the left knee,...