My Absolute Worst Night With Matching Baby Christmas Pajamas
The zipper was officially jammed in the microfleece reindeer antlers. It was roughly two in the morning on December twenty-third, and my six-month-old, Maya, was screaming with the raw intensity of a level-one trauma arrival. Her face was the color...
Surviving the Hype: Baby Quilt Patterns and Actual Safe Sleep
It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was eight months pregnant with Maya, sobbing over a jammed bobbin on a borrowed Singer sewing machine. I was wearing maternity leggings that definitely had a hole in the crotch, my...
Debugging The Baby Beanie: My Thermal Miscalculations As A Dad
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, roughly two weeks after we brought our son home, and I was staring at the Nanit monitor on my nightstand like it was a mission-critical server dashboard. The camera feed showed my kid...
Baby Blanket Size: A Messy, Exhausted Guide to Getting It Right
I was standing in my kitchen wearing my absolutely tragic gray maternity joggers, holding my third cup of violently lukewarm coffee, when I realized I was drowning in conflicting advice. I was pregnant with Leo, my first, and three different...
The impossible physics of keeping baby socks on kicking feet
At 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, I found myself on my hands and knees in the nursery, using my iPhone flashlight to hunt for a microscopic piece of gray fabric. My eleven-month-old son was asleep in his crib, oblivious to...
A letter to myself about the perfect onesie set
Listen. You're currently standing over the bassinet at 3:14 AM watching a mustard-yellow stain slowly bloom across the back of your daughter's supposedly leak-proof pajamas. You're exhausted. You're calculating how many hours of sleep you can get before your shift...
My Epic Fail And Why Organic Newborn Socks Are Actually Vital
I was sitting on my faded living room rug, trying to pack up three Etsy orders before the mail carrier came, when I looked over and saw my oldest son treating his own foot like a pacifier. He was about...
Escaping Sausage Casings: short sleeve pajamas toddler edition
It's 7:14 PM on a damp Tuesday, and I'm currently employing a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu move I saw on YouTube just to get my two-year-old's arm into a pajama top. Elsie is howling indignantly; her twin sister Maya is standing on...
The chaotic truth about finding vetement pour garcon that lasts
It's 8:14 AM and I'm currently staring at a photo on my phone from exactly six months ago. Leo, my seven-year-old, is wearing these mustard yellow corduroys that I spent way too much money on. In the photo, they're pristine....