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Why Your Baby Shower Entrance Doesn't Need A Giant Plastic Poster
There I was, thirty-two weeks pregnant with Maya, standing behind the dumpsters of a suburban Italian restaurant with half a lukewarm iced coffee in my hand. I was wearing this floral maternity wrap dress that aggressively rode up every time...
The brutal reality of picking baby shower invitations for a girl
I was twenty-six weeks pregnant, eating fruit antacids like they were candy, staring at my laptop at two in the morning. The screen was a sea of aggressively pink digital paper. The search query was simple enough. I was just...
Surviving the Logistics of Boy Baby Shower Invites
It was 11 PM on a Tuesday. I had a Google Sheet open with column headers for "Paper Weight (GSM)" and "Postage Cost Variance." My wife, Sarah, who was seven months pregnant at the time, walked into the kitchen holding...
What to Look for in a Baby Shower Guest Dress (Without Losing Your ...
Dear Jess of six months ago, currently standing in front of your open closet, sweating into a stained Target graphic tee while trying to figure out what the heck "garden casual" means. I see you, I'm you, and I need...
Finding A Baby Shower Dress That Actually Fits (Without The Tears)
Dear Sarah from six months ago—wait, no. Maya is four now. So, dear Sarah from four years and six months ago. Whatever. Time is a completely meaningless construct anyway when you haven't had a full night of uninterrupted sleep since...
Surviving the Late-Night Chaos of Baby Shower Cookies
It was 2:13 AM and I was standing in my kitchen wearing my husband's college sweatpants and a nursing tank that definitely smelled like sour milk, holding a piping bag of pale yellow icing that was supposed to look like...
The Only Honest Guide to Venues for Baby Shower Celebrations
I'm currently sitting on the floor of my Etsy inventory room, aggressively tearing off pieces of packing tape for a massive stack of custom nursery signs, while my youngest child uses my left ankle as a teething ring. My phone...
Writing a Baby Shower Card That Doesn't Sound Completely Awkward
My mother told me a shower card must make the pregnant woman cry tears of deep joy. My buddy Dave said I should just scribble "Sleep is a lie, good luck" on a Post-it and tape a twenty-dollar bill to...
Exactly What to Write on Baby Shower Card Without Stressing
Dear Jess from six months ago, You're currently sitting in the driver's seat of the F-150 outside the Methodist church fellowship hall, sweating clean through your only halfway decent maternity-friendly dress. The baby shower starts in exactly four minutes. You...