Magazine

A frustrated dad staring at a laptop screen filled with a spreadsheet of baby names

The Google Sheet That Nearly Broke Us: A Guide to Baby Girl Names

Row 47 of our shared Google Sheet was where my marriage nearly met its untimely end over the name 'Blythe'. My wife, heavily pregnant and radiating a sort of exhausted menace, argued that it sounded literary and sophisticated. I argued...

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A tired father staring at a complex plastic bouncing contraption while holding two identical screaming infants.

Dear Past Me: The Truth About That Newborn Jumper Fantasy

Dear Tom of six months ago, You're currently sitting on the hallway floor of our terribly drafted London flat at 3:14 in the morning. Your left shoulder smells aggressively of sour milk, your right knee is entirely numb from the...

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A visibly exhausted dad wiping spaghetti off a wall while twin toddlers hold silicone spoons.

The Great Spaghetti Bolognese Incident and Feeding Set Truths

There's a very specific, hollow sound that a ceramic bowl makes when it hits a hardwood floor after being launched from the terrifying altitude of an Ikea highchair. It's a sound that instantly ages you five years. It was a...

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A frustrated dad holding a chunky knitted baby cardigan covered in a mysterious brown stain.

The Great Wool Disaster: Surviving a Ridiculous Baby Knit Set

The clock on the microwave said 3:14 AM, and the smell hit me before I even reached the landing. It was that distinct, metallic, sweet-yet-horrific scent of a total nappy failure. In the cot, Matilda was standing up, gripping the...

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Two toddlers in thick winter trousers standing by a damp London playground slide.

Dear Past Me: Surviving the Great Cozy Legging Winter Crisis

Dear Tom of six months ago, You're currently standing in the hallway holding a miniature pair of stiff, dark-wash denim jeans. You have a lukewarm coffee balancing precariously on the radiator, and you're sweating profusely as Maya and Isla do...

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Twin baby girls wearing vintage style dresses in a pram

Dear Past Tom: The Truth About Vintage Style Infant Dresses

Dear Tom of six months ago. It's 3 AM, and you're currently staring at your phone in the dark, bidding forty quid on a pair of authentic 1950s smocked baby gowns on eBay. Stop it immediately. Put the phone down,...

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