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grief supportinfant lossmaternal mental healthmotherhoodpregnancy lossrainbow baby
Mom looking at a wooden keepsake box holding a tiny hospital bracelet and sonogram

A letter to myself about surviving the loss of our baby angel

You're sitting on the bathroom floor holding a plastic wand with two pink lines, completely oblivious to the fact that in exactly twenty-two weeks, you'll be sitting on this exact same tile holding a cardboard memory box from the hospital....

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4-month-oldbaby giftsorganic baby clothesrainbow babyteething
Pediatric nurse holding a crying infant while testing out life w baby

Life with a newborn: Survival tactics from a tired pediatric nurse

I spent my first week at home with my son staring at a spreadsheet I built to track his bowel movements. It was three in the morning, my nursing scrub top was stained with spit-up, and I was holding a...

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family careinfant lossmental healthmotherhoodrainbow baby
A simple wooden memory box sitting on a folded cotton blanket

Surviving the Heartbreak Nobody Wants to Talk About

Don't bring a grieving mother a tuna casserole and tell her that God just needed another angel. I was standing in my kitchen, wearing the same stained sweatpants I’d had on for three days, holding a lukewarm Pyrex dish while...

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Tired mom sitting on the floor with a dog and baby gear scattered around

Miss Nikki Baby, Rainbow Babies, and Tuning Out the Internet Noise

I spent the entirety of my second pregnancy locked in the downstairs half-bath, doom-scrolling baby forums until my legs fell asleep and my phone battery hit two percent. I was convinced every tiny twinge was a catastrophe, and I was...

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maternal mental healthnursery decorparenthoodpregnancy tipsrainbow baby
Wooden alpaca and rainbow play gym in a sunlit London nursery

The Complicated Reality of Expecting After a Loss

The paper sheet on the examination table crinkled with a sound so violently loud it seemed to echo off the drab walls of the University College Hospital fetal medicine unit. It was a Tuesday, it was raining in that relentless,...

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maternal mental healthmotherhoodorganic baby clothespregnancy tipsrainbow baby
A soft organic bamboo rainbow blanket folded in a crib

What Is a Rainbow Baby? The Beautiful, Messy, Anxious Reality

I was standing in the wildly unflattering fluorescent lighting of a Buc-ee's bathroom off I-35 when I saw the two pink lines. My oldest, who's a walking cautionary tale of why you shouldn't let a toddler eat a powdered donut...

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