Magazine

90s nostalgiababy sleepnewbornparenting humor
Exhausted mom holding a fussing newborn in a dimly lit living room with the TV glowing.

Dear Jess: Surviving Colic and Why We Watch Cry-Baby 1990 Now

Dear Jess from six months ago. You're currently sitting on the cold linoleum of the laundry room floor at 3:14 AM. The dryer is tumbling a single wet towel just to generate enough white noise to drown out the ringing...

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baby healthbaby toysfourth trimestermillennialnewbornteething
Exhausted mom drinking coffee while holding a crying baby in a messy nursery

The Messy Truth About Raising Cute Babies (And Surviving The Crying)

It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was trying to wrestle a screaming, four-day-old Leo out of a stiff, scratchy mustard-yellow linen romper that had, like, seventeen tiny wooden buttons. I was sweating through my nursing bra. My...

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A messy living room showing the reality of a newborn baby invasion with scattered burp cloths and sleep sacks.

Surviving the Real Baby Invasion Without Completely Losing Your Mind

It was day four. The milk had just come in. My living room was littered with breast pump parts, half-empty water bottles, and those terrible mesh hospital underwear. My husband was sitting on the edge of the sofa, bathed in...

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baby milestonesbudgetnewbornorganic cottonparenting humorphotography
Tired mom holding her baby near a bright window trying to take a picture on her phone

How to Take Decent Baby Pictures Without Losing Your Entire Mind

I was sweating through my favorite gray t-shirt, balancing on one foot on a dining room chair, making noises that sounded like a dying turkey. Below me, my oldest son, Hunter, was screaming bloody murder from inside a $60 woven...

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A soft organic cotton bodysuit next to a packed hospital bag

Baby Girl Coming Home Outfit: A Letter to My Exhausted Self

Dear Jess, You're currently sitting cross-legged on the nursery rug, 38 weeks pregnant, sweating right through your maternity bra while staring at three different browser tabs full of $80 smocked linen rompers. It's 2 AM, your sciatica is acting up,...

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baby healthinfant caremotherhoodnewbornparenting humor
Tired mom holding a newborn baby in a pediatrician clinic waiting room

The Exhausted Parent's Guide to Choosing a Great Baby Doctor

I'm currently typing this one-handed on my phone in a clinic waiting room that smells aggressively like rubbing alcohol and cheap cherry lollipops, while my youngest tries to aggressively gnaw my collarbone off. The lady across from me is staring...

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baby healthfourth trimestermental healthnewbornorganic baby clothesparenting humor
A tired dad holding a newborn baby while looking at his smartphone in a dark room

What the bhad baby news taught me about newborn survival mode

The blue light from my phone was set to the absolute lowest brightness, but in the pitch black of our Portland bedroom at 3:17 AM, it still felt like staring directly into a laser pointer. My eleven-month-old daughter was asleep...

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baby blanketsbaby gearfatherhoodnewbornparenthood
Wooden Kianao baby gym with leaf and moon hanging toys

The Josh Naylor Playoff Baby Situation and MLB Paternity Leave

Don't attempt to fix a P1 production bug while your wife's contractions are exactly three minutes apart. I thought I could deploy a quick hotfix from the triage room at Providence Portland while we waited for a doctor. My wife,...

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A stressed mom holding up a tiny, stained organic cotton baby bodysuit.

I Cried In A Baby Clothing Store, Then A Blowout Ruined My Haul

It was 3:14 in the morning, and the mustard-yellow explosion had breached the diaper, traveled up my firstborn’s back, and was making a steady, terrifying march toward his neckline. I was operating on maybe forty minutes of broken sleep, standing...

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