She Gon Call Me Baby Boo TikTok Trend Nearly Ended Me
I was knee-deep in a pile of unsorted laundry—the kind of massive, intimidating pile where you honestly can't tell what's actually clean and what has just been worn for five minutes and tossed on the floor by a toddler—when my...
My Utterly Chaotic, Milk-Stained Guide To Sign Language For Babies
It’s 5:43 AM on a Tuesday in November. I'm wearing my husband Dave’s stained gray sweatpants and a maternity tank top that I’m pretty sure has been inside-out since Sunday. Maya is exactly eight months and two days old, and...
Surviving the Messy Truth of the Suki Waterhouse Baby Era
I was exactly four days postpartum with my oldest, wedged awkwardly between the toilet and the bathtub in my rural Texas house, trying to angle my phone so the giant hospital-grade pad wouldn't show in the mirror. I had seen...
The Clinical Truth About Momcozy Carriers and Hip Geometry
The wind coming off Lake Michigan was zero degrees, and I was standing in the Target parking lot on Clybourn trying to figure out a plastic buckle. My three-month-old was screaming in the backseat. I had just pulled him from...
The Hackney Standoff: Two Babies, One Urban Fox, Zero Dignity
At 5:43 AM on a drizzly Tuesday, I found myself in a high-stakes staring contest with a mangy urban fox. I was armed only with a lukewarm mug of instant coffee and two extremely confident toddlers who were aggressively wielding...
The Truth About Unique Baby Gifts From A Mom Who Kept The Receipts
I'm currently standing in my garage sweating through my favorite oversized t-shirt, aggressively trying to shove a five-foot-tall plush giraffe into a cardboard donation box while my toddler throws stale Cheerios at the dog. My oldest, bless her heart, was...
What the King Harris Baby Drama Taught Me About Surviving Newborns
Dear Jess from six months ago. I know exactly where you're right now, and I'm just gonna be real with you—you need to put the phone down. You're sitting on the very edge of the rocking chair in the nursery,...
The jason lee and tiffany haddish baby rumour broke my brain
Whatever you do, don't look at celebrity Instagram accounts at three in the morning while one of your two-year-olds is actively trying to dismantle a stair gate with a plastic spoon. I made this massive mistake last August, which is...
Dear Past Me: Navigating The New Trump Account Drama
Dear Sarah from six months ago, It's April 14th. You're sitting at the kitchen island in those gray sweatpants—you know, the ones with the bleach stain on the left thigh that you refuse to throw away. It's 11:32 PM. You're...