Magazine
Lord Baby Runs a Romance Fantasy With Cash 92 vs. My Twins
The digital clock on the nursery wall glared at me: 3:14 AM. The room smelled distinctly of stale Calpol and desperation. In the left cot, Evie was violently chewing the wooden bars like a tiny, furious beaver. In the right...
Lactose Free Baby Formula: A Dad's Guide To Tummy Troubleshooting
Dear Marcus of exactly six months ago. You're currently standing in the kitchen at 3:14 AM, the rain is aggressively hitting the Portland windows, and your son is screaming in a frequency that I'm pretty sure is permanently damaging the...
The truth about moving your backyard chicks outdoors safely
The guy at the rural feed store with the missing thumb told me four weeks. The homesteading influencer on TikTok, who somehow wears pristine white linen in an active barn, said eight weeks minimum. My neighbor who treats her three...
The Existential Dread of Nursery Organization at 2 AM
I'm currently sitting cross-legged on the floor of my daughter's room at 2:14 AM, using a camping headlamp to sort her organic cotton socks by color gradient. The smart thermostat is locked at exactly 69.5 degrees, the humidifier is outputting...
What Does Baby Booster Mean? My Chaotic Guide To Seats And Sanity
Tuesday, 4:13 PM. Itβs pouring rain, my iced coffee is watering down to a depressing beige puddle in my cupholder, and I'm standing next to my Honda CR-V staring at my phone while Leo, who's four and possesses the lung...
What Does a Baby Cockroach Look Like? My 2 AM Nursery Panic
Dear Jess from six months ago, Put down the heavy shoe, stop crying into the clean laundry basket, and take a deep breath. You're sitting on the nursery floor at 2 AM with a flashlight, going down a frantic internet...
Finding a Backyard Rescue: What Do Baby Possums Eat?
My oldest son, Jackson, is a walking cautionary tale for why you should never let a five-year-old play unsupervised near a woodpile. Yesterday, he came marching through the back door holding something gray, hairless, and wriggling in his hands like...
What I Wish I Knew Before Feeding Our Backyard Baby Chicks
Dear Sarah of exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting in the driver's seat of the Subaru in the Tractor Supply parking lot. Your iced coffee is sweating all over the center console, you're wearing that stained gray college sweatshirt...
Why Chasing the Myth of the Unicorn Baby Nearly Ruined My First Year
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was sitting on the floor of the nursery in a tragically stained Nirvana t-shirt that smelled heavily of sour milk and desperation. Maya was three months old, and she was screaming....