The Terrifying Bobblehead Phase: Babies Holding Their Heads Up
My mother-in-law was holding Florence, who was precisely eighteen days old at the time, when she decided to gesture wildly with both hands while telling a long-winded story about a rogue fox in her garden. For three horrifying seconds, Florenceβs...
The Great Lentil Smear: Iron Rich Foods for Babies Explained
I'm currently standing in my kitchen, staring at a beige splatter on the ceiling that used to be a highly nutritious, iron-fortified chicken and white bean puree, wondering where my journalism career went so spectacularly wrong. Twin A (Florence) is...
Surviving the Baby Walker With Wheels (A Twin Dad's Story)
I was precisely halfway through pouring a vaguely warm coffee down my throat when Florence broke the indoor land speed record. We have a narrow Victorian hallway in our London terrace, which is entirely unsuitable for anything wider than a...
Dear Past Tom: Surviving the Baby Saja Netflix Obsession
Dear Tom of exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting on the battered grey sofa in our Islington flat, smugly sipping a lukewarm cup of PG Tips. The twins are peacefully napping, and you're thinking to yourself that you've finally...
A Letter To Past Me About Baby Memes And Surviving Twin Girls
You're currently sitting on the closed lid of the downstairs loo at exactly 3:14 AM. The tiles are freezing against your bare feet, and you're hiding. I know this because I'm you, writing from six months in the future. Upstairs,...
Is the Recaro Baby Seat Actually Worth It? A Twin Dad's Review
The greatest lie the baby gear industry ever sold us is the concept of portability. There's a persistent, completely delusional myth that you'll buy a premium child car seat, click it effortlessly into your vehicle on a Tuesday, and then...
The Brutal Truth About Hip Carriers From a Broken Twin Dad
Tuesday, 4:15 PM. The rain is pelting the roof of my battered estate car in the Waitrose car park. One twin is arching her back like an angry prawn, absolutely refusing to be extracted from her baby car seat. The...
When Can Babies Eat Baby Food? A Dad's Guide To The Mess
It was 5:43 PM on a Tuesday, and I was sitting cross-legged on the kitchen floor, using a single wet wipe to scrape what used to be a premium organic avocado off the skirting board. Above me, my twin daughters...
The absolute origami nightmare of strapping on a baby carrier
I was standing in the middle of our cramped London kitchen at two in the afternoon, sweating profusely, completely tangled in eighteen feet of modal fabric. One twin was screaming from the bouncy chair on the floor, the other was...