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The Great Dance Recital Rash and Why I Burned That Nylon Bodysuit
We were wedged in the stall of the tiny, non-air-conditioned bathroom at Miss Patty's School of Dance, and my four-year-old was screaming like I was actively peeling off her actual skin. Lily had just finished the dress rehearsal for her...
Toddler Sweaters Boy Edition: What Actually Works for Winter
My mother-in-law told me to put three layers of thick wool on him or his lungs would freeze the second we stepped onto the Chicago pavement. The moms in my playgroup swore by fifty-dollar beige cashmere rollnecks that require dry...
Hosen Kinder: Why Stiff Baby Trousers Are a Hardware Failure
There I was at month four, holding what looked like a perfectly scaled-down replica of my own selvedge denim jeans, staring at my son while he executed a perfect, continuous death roll on the changing table. I had exactly three...
My Honest Review on Why We Finally Switched to Baumwoll Leggins
I'm currently sitting cross-legged on the floor of my guest roomβwhich is actually just my Etsy shipping room masquerading as a guest roomβstaring at a plastic tote bin full of toddler clothes my oldest daughter wore three years ago. I...
Why Pippi LΓ€tzchen Saved Us from the Teething Drool Nightmare
I'm standing in my kitchen at 4:12 PM on a Tuesday in late November. I'm wearing my husband's oversized grey fleece that smells vaguely of stale coffee and desperation, and I'm holding my five-month-old son, Leo. He is screaming. Not...
LΓ€tzchen Silikon: Why I abandoned the cloth bib fantasy
It was day four of baby-led weaning. My son had managed to work a single wedge of roasted sweet potato into his hair, his ears, and the space between his toes. But the real tragedy was his chest. He was...
Die richtige ZahnbΓΌrste fΓΌr Kleinkinder finden (ohne Drama)
Meine Schwiegermutter drΓ€ngte mich am Dienstagmorgen in der KΓΌche in die Ecke β sie trug diese furchteinflΓΆΓende SchΓΌrze mit den riesigen Sonnenblumen, an der noch etwas Mehl klebte β, fuchtelte mit einem Pfannenwender herum und meinte: βRubbel einfach mit einem...
My Complete Breakdown Over The Trendy Baby Tee Crop Top Phase
It was exactly 9:43 AM on a Tuesday, and I was bent at a perfect ninety-degree angle over the damp sand at Centennial Park, frantically trying to dig what looked like a half-chewed cigarette butt out of my four-year-old Mayaβs...
A Letter to Past Me About the Reality of Wooden Toys
Dear Tom of six months ago, You're currently standing in the nursery, aggressively arranging a set of aesthetically pleasing, neutral-toned blocks on a floating shelf. You're exhausted, operating on perhaps four cumulative hours of sleep, but you're deeply smug. You've...