Magazine

Exhausted dad sitting in a dark nursery holding a baby monitor and looking confused

The Gone Baby Gone Cast Has Nothing on My 3 AM Detective Work

My mother swore he was just hungry, my hipster neighbor confidently diagnosed a "leap 6 sleep regression," and a random guy in my Portland coffee shop told me he was definitely sensing my own unresolved childhood trauma. Three totally different...

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A stressed father holding a tiny, overly stiff baby polo shirt.

The undeniable madness of the Ralph Lauren baby boy aesthetic

When my mate Dave's wife was expecting their first boy, the unsolicited wardrobe advice came thick and fast, arriving with all the force of a high-speed train. Dave's mum insisted he needed tiny little cable-knit cardigans to look "respectable" (respectable...

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A stressed dad holding his phone in a dark nursery with an 11-month-old baby in a carrier.

The punching babies in public prank is ruining my algorithm

The time was exactly 2:14 AM, the nursery thermostat was reading a stable 69.4 degrees, and I was making the biggest digital mistake of my life. My 11-month-old, Maya, was currently undergoing some sort of developmental firmware update where she...

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Tired dad looking at a laptop while baby plays with a silicone plate on highchair

I panic-googled Roblox pill babies at 2 AM so you do not have to

I was sitting on my brother’s couch in southeast Portland last Sunday, desperately trying to keep my squirming 11-month-old from eating a suspicious clump of golden retriever hair, when my nine-year-old nephew yelled into his gaming headset: "Bro, grab the...

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Two toddlers pointing at a television screen showing a cartoon pig family

How Peppa Pig's New Arrival Fixed Our Sibling Transition Chaos

I was sitting cross-legged on a spectacularly stained rug, holding up a somewhat mangled stuffed rabbit and speaking in a high-pitched voice, trying to explain the concept of human gestation to my two-year-old twin daughters. They stared at me with...

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A dad checking the temperature of baked ribs next to a messy baby in a high chair.

A Dad's Guide to Oven Baked Baby Back Ribs for BLW Beginners

I'm currently staring at a massive slab of raw pork on my kitchen counter while managing three very different, very aggressive text threads. My mother is suggesting I boil the meat until it turns into a gray, flavorless paste and...

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Tired dad wearing headphones looking at a laptop while a baby chews on a silicone teether.

Why Watching Oh Enthan Baby With My Kid Was A Tactical Error

The thermostat read exactly 71.4 degrees, the humidifier was running at a steady thirty percent output, and my daughter Maya was finally asleep in the portable bassinet we dragged into the living room. It was 8:14 PM. My wife and...

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