Magazine

Tired dad looking at a motorized infant container next to a sleeping baby

A Letter to Past Me About the Illusion of the Perfect Baby Swing

Hey Marcus from six months ago. It's November, it's raining in Portland again, and you're currently staring at a $250 motorized bucket that oscillates at exactly 43 beats per minute while you pray it'll silence the tiny human who has...

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Tired mom drinking coffee next to a large baby swing in a messy living room

The Ingenuity Baby Swing Sleep Myth That Totally Broke My Heart

It was 3:14 AM on a random Tuesday in August, and I was sitting on my incredibly stained living room rug wearing a nursing bra that smelled entirely like sour milk and desperation. Leo was four weeks old. He was...

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A tired mom wearing a baby in a floral pattern soft structured carrier.

My Messy Journey With the Tula Carrier (And Why I Kept It)

It was a hundred and two degrees in July, right in the middle of a rural Texas Target parking lot, and my arms were bent backward like a stale pretzel. I was leaning heavily against the side of my minivan,...

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A dad nervously checking the rearview mirror at a baby in a rear-facing car seat.

The real baby driver 2: A letter to my past self about car seat panic

Dear Marcus from six months ago, You're currently idling in the driveway of the Hawthorne Fred Meyer in your Subaru. The engine is running. The heater is set exactly to 70 degrees because you read somewhere that anything else will...

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A confused dad looking at an at-home baby doppler device next to a laptop.

The Great Baby Doppler Debug: Why I Stopped Tracking Heartbeats

My mother told me that if I just pressed a toilet paper tube against my wife’s belly, I could hear the baby’s heartbeat perfectly. A senior developer on my team swore by buying a discarded clinical-grade ultrasound machine off eBay...

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Marcus holding the tiny black breast pump next to a massive coffee mug

Baby Buddha Pump: Why This Tiny Device Is A Vacuum Engine

It's 2 AM on a Tuesday. My wife is sitting in the glider, holding this sleek black plastic rectangle that's honestly smaller than my smartphone. We bought it because the internet forums promised it was a "cute" and "highly portable"...

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baby brezza bottle washer pro on a messy kitchen counter

Dear me from 6 months ago: The Baby Brezza Bottle Washer Pro

Dear me from six months ago, You're currently standing at the kitchen sink. It's, like, 3:14 AM. You're wearing those gray Target sweatpants that have a mysterious crusty spot on the left knee and your hair is in a knot...

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A frustrated mom looking at a flexible mesh baby gate spanning a hallway.

The Blunt Truth About Retractable Baby Gates (And My Worst Night)

It was 6:15 PM, I had a half-empty jar of marinara sauce tucked under my left arm, a screaming six-month-old anchored on my right hip, and my two-year-old was actively trying to feed the dog a AAA battery he found...

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A stressed dad wearing a tush baby carrier in a crowded London pub

The Tush Baby Survival Guide: Why I Wear a Tactical Hip Shelf

We were somewhere near the dinosaur skeletons at the Natural History Museum when my left bicep finally went on strike. Maya had decided the floor was lava, Chloe had decided the pram was a medieval torture device, and I was...

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