Magazine

Tired mom filling out birth certificate paperwork on a hospital bed

What nobody tells you about the most popular baby names 2024

My mother-in-law told me I had to pick an astrologically aligned name or my son's digestion would be ruined forever. The lactation consultant at shift change whispered that giving a kid an 'A' name makes them aggressive. Then my husband's...

Read more

A dusty 90s plush bear sitting next to a modern organic silicone baby teether

The Truth About The Most Expensive Beanie Babies

I'm sitting on the concrete floor of my parents' garage in the Chicago suburbs, sneezing thirty years of dust out of my nose. In front of me is a massive plastic storage bin labeled with my name and the phrase...

Read more

Mom adjusting the straps on a newborn with low muscle tone in a car seat

Stop Saying Mongoloid Baby: Real Talk About Down Syndrome

I was sweating straight through my maternity leggings in the back of our Honda Odyssey, crying so hard I couldn’t see the buckles. It was August in rural Texas, which is basically the surface of the sun, and we hadn’t...

Read more

Mother wearing baby in carrier while walking through a parking lot

The Truth Behind the Missing Baby Yucaipa Panic

The rain was pounding on the windshield of my Honda Odyssey in a Chicago Target parking lot. I was sitting there with the engine idling, watching my toddler sleep in his car seat, dreading the moment I had to wake...

Read more

Stressed mom holding a remote control looking shocked at the TV screen

Dear Past Jess: Please Do Not Put On That Million Dollar Baby Film

Dear exhausted Jess from six months ago, You’re currently sitting on the beige sectional that smells vaguely of sour milk and desperation. It's raining sideways here in rural Texas, your Etsy shop orders are backed up to the moon, and...

Read more

Dad sitting by a wooden baby gym researching Tommy Richman track meanings on his phone

What Are the Tommy Richman Million Dollar Baby Lyrics About?

My coworker Dave pinged me on Slack Tuesday morning to say I desperately needed to block a certain new Tommy Richman song on Spotify because the themes were way too mature for my house. Two hours later, my mother-in-law called...

Read more

A tired dad holding a baby while looking at his smartphone in a dark room.

Why That Megan Fox Post-Baby Appearance Made Me Lose My Mind

The glowing numbers on the microwave read 3:14 AM, which I know because I had just logged a massive diaper blowout into our shared baby app using my left thumb while suspending my screaming four-month-old over the sink with my...

Read more

Tired dad holding a smartphone while twin toddlers play in the background

The Mason Disick Baby Hoax and My Massive Digital Parenting Panic

My mum told me on Tuesday that if I ever post another photo of the girls online, criminals on the dark web will steal their identities and open credit cards in their names. A bloke I vaguely know from the...

Read more

A tired mom sitting on a beige rug drinking coffee while looking stressed at her phone.

Why The Margot Robbie Baby Philosophy Is Actually Pure Genius

I was sitting on my tragic beige living room rug at 3:14 AM wearing a visibly stained nursing bra and my husband Dave's oversized college sweatpants, crying into a lukewarm mug of decaf coffee. I was fully sobbing because my...

Read more