Magazine
How A Weird Little Platypus Baby Cured My Milestone Anxiety
I was sitting on the freezing hexagonal tiles of our extremely cramped downstairs bathroom at 3:14 AM wearing a pair of Dave's gym shorts that Iβd aggressively rolled up at the waist and a nursing tank covered in what I...
I panic-googled Roblox pill babies at 2 AM so you do not have to
I was sitting on my brotherβs couch in southeast Portland last Sunday, desperately trying to keep my squirming 11-month-old from eating a suspicious clump of golden retriever hair, when my nine-year-old nephew yelled into his gaming headset: "Bro, grab the...
The Night I Dropped a Pill (And How We Survive Meds Now)
I was wearing my husband Danβs threadbare college lacrosse t-shirt, it was 2:14 in the morning, and I was on my hands and knees with my iPhone flashlight in my mouth, frantically sweeping the kitchen floor with my bare hands....
Debugging the photoshoot: When taking baby photos goes wrong
I'm balancing precariously on a plastic step stool, my phone hovering exactly 28 inches above the crib mattress, sweat pooling in the small of my back. Below me, my 11-month-old son is thrashing like a malfunctioning animatronic, actively destroying the...
The 3 AM Meltdown That Made Me Believe in Custom Storybooks
It was exactly 3:14 AM. I know this because the glowing red numbers on the alarm clock were burning a hole into my retinas while I sat there nursing a three-day-old infant and chugging day-old cold brew that tasted profoundly...
How Peppa Pig's New Arrival Fixed Our Sibling Transition Chaos
I was sitting cross-legged on a spectacularly stained rug, holding up a somewhat mangled stuffed rabbit and speaking in a high-pitched voice, trying to explain the concept of human gestation to my two-year-old twin daughters. They stared at me with...
The Truth About Pehr Nursery Gear (And What Actually Matters)
I was thirty-eight weeks pregnant with my oldest, sweating through a maternity tank top in the middle of a brutal Texas July, just staring at a pile of nursery gifts on the floor that made me want to cry. My...
What the Patrick Mahomes Baby Taught Me About Surviving Three
Dear Jess from six months ago. You're currently sitting on the floor of our laundry room, crying over a mountain of unmatched tiny socks while your two toddlers use your Etsy shipping boxes as a literal wrestling ring in the...
My Papoose Baby Era: How I Survived The Clingy Newborn Phase
2:14 AM. A Tuesday in mid-November. I was standing in the middle of our tiny galley kitchen wearing a pair of maternity leggings that smelled vaguely of spit-up and stale coffee, desperately trying to wrap fifteen feet of gray stretchy...