Magazine
What to Do When You Look Outside and See a Baby Rat Near Your Kids
It was 6:15 on a freezing Tuesday morning, and I was standing in my kitchen wearing a pair of inside-out Target leggingsβyou know the ones with the side pocket that always sags?βdrinking my third espresso because Maya was going through...
The undeniable madness of the Ralph Lauren baby boy aesthetic
When my mate Dave's wife was expecting their first boy, the unsolicited wardrobe advice came thick and fast, arriving with all the force of a high-speed train. Dave's mum insisted he needed tiny little cable-knit cardigans to look "respectable" (respectable...
What the rainbow baby definition actually means in real life
It was a Tuesday in late October, raining that gross sideways rain we get in Seattle, and I was sitting in the driver's seat of my Honda CR-V in the Walgreens parking lot. I was wearing these awful maternity leggings...
The punching babies in public prank is ruining my algorithm
The time was exactly 2:14 AM, the nursery thermostat was reading a stable 69.4 degrees, and I was making the biggest digital mistake of my life. My 11-month-old, Maya, was currently undergoing some sort of developmental firmware update where she...
Proud Curvy Girl Seeks Lost Baby Daddy: 3 AM Doomscroll Notes
Dear Priya from last November. You're currently sitting on the closed lid of the downstairs toilet. The bathmat is damp under your bare feet because your husband took a shower three hours ago and didn't turn on the exhaust fan....
What I Wish I Knew Before Obsessing Over Popular Baby Names 2024
It was 2017, a Tuesday, and I was sweating through a heather-gray maternity tunic at a crowded Starbucks on 4th Street, desperately trying to ignore the fact that my compression leggings were actively cutting off circulation to my thighs. My...
The hospital whiteboard standoff over popular baby names
Squeak, squeak, squeak. That was the sound of my former coworker, a night charge nurse named Sarah, tapping a dry erase marker against the whiteboard in Room 4 at Northwestern Memorial. I was twenty-eight hours postpartum. I was leaking from...
Searching For A Plug In Baby: The Truth About Newborn Soothing
It was Tuesday, somewhere around 3:14 AM, and I was standing in the middle of our dark nursery wearing my husband Daveβs stained college sweatpants, smelling entirely like sour milk and absolute defeat. Leo was two weeks old and he...
The Ultimate Play Mat Baby Survival Guide For Exhausted Parents
I'm sitting cross-legged on my faded West Elm rug. Itβs a Tuesday morning in 2017, I'm wearing black maternity leggings that I aggressively refuse to retire even though Maya is four months old, and I'm staring at a flashing, screeching,...