The Honest Parent Guide to the Baby Guinness Shot
It was nine at night on a Tuesday and my toddler was treating our living room like a hostile takeover. Rohan had three molars breaking through his gums simultaneously and I was doing the classic parent sway in the kitchen,...
The Real Truth About Finding A Hardware Mounted Baby Gate With Door
My mother-in-law told me I didn't need one because, in her day, they just watched their kids. The neighborhood Facebook group insisted I needed a custom, four-hundred-dollar lucite barricade imported from Sweden. Then my old charge nurse from the pediatric...
Pacing the Kitchen Floor After That Tragic Baby Emmanuel News
The kitchen tiles are brutally cold at 3:14 am, especially when you're wearing only mismatched socks and a t-shirt heavily compromised by regurgitated milk. Florence, the twin who treats sleep as a personal insult, had been screaming for forty-five minutes...
The Kentucky Cheerleader Case and My Postpartum Wake-Up Call
I was sitting cross-legged on the linoleum floor of my laundry room at 3:14 AM, aggressively folding a pile of those impossibly tiny baby socks that somehow always lose their mates, when the headline popped up on my phone screen....
Why I Threw Out My First Baby’s Clothes for Organic Cotton
I was sitting on the floor of my Texas laundry room last Tuesday, elbow-deep in a plastic storage bin labeled "0-6 Months," when I pulled out a stiff, neon-orange "Daddy's Little Monster" onesie I bought for my oldest kid five...
The Tiffany Trump Baby Reality Check: Postpartum Is Just Messy
I was elbow-deep in a diaper blowout at three in the morning when I first saw the announcement. I was wiping zinc oxide off my elbow, trying not to wake my husband, just blindly scrolling my feed. That was when...
The brutally honest truth about when your baby can drink water
We were sitting on my back patio in Chicago, the humidity hovering somewhere around ninety percent, when my mother-in-law casually pulled a tiny stainless steel cup from her purse. She filled it with tap water from the kitchen and moved...
How I Survived the Absolute Chaos of Infant Blowouts and Runny Poop
I'm standing in the cramped, overly bright bathroom of a Buc-ee's somewhere off I-35, staring at my oldest son who's currently painted from waist to shoulder blades in what looks like radioactive mustard. He's screaming his lungs out. I'm actively...
The brutal truth about baby cough medicine and what actually works
At 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, I was standing in my dark kitchen holding a thrashing, coughing toddler while my phone lit up with three different text threads. My mom was typing paragraphs about rubbing warm mustard oil on his...