Debugging the Johnson's Baby Oil Skin Hydration Myth for Dads
My hands are slick with a ridiculous amount of synthetic fragrance and highly refined petroleum, and my eleven-month-old son is currently sliding across the living room hardwoods like an aggressive, giggling hockey puck. It's a Tuesday evening. I'm trying to...
Real Advice on How to Stop Baby Hiccups Without Losing Your Mind
"Put a wet piece of thread on his forehead," my mother-in-law instructed over FaceTime, holding her phone entirely too close to her face. My neighbor, who means well but reads too many mommy blogs, told me later that afternoon to...
Spotting the Symptoms of RSV in Babies Before You Panic
"Just put sliced raw onions in his socks," my neighbor Brenda texted me at 11 PM on a Tuesday, which is honestly unhinged behavior but I was too tired to block her. Meanwhile, my mother-in-law had already called twice to...
Don't Throw the Baby Out With the Bathwater: Note to Past Priya
It's three in the morning on a Tuesday. You're currently standing over the kitchen garbage can, holding a sleep sack covered in what we clinically refer to as a code brown. You're debating whether to just burn the garment, the...
The chaotic reality of opening a trump baby account for your toddler
It was midnight on a tuesday when my husband forwarded me an email from our cpa that made my left eye twitch. I was sitting on the nursery floor in my old nursing scrubs, trying to wipe pureed sweet potato...
Why I Almost Put Hawaiian Baby Woodrose in My Baby's Nursery
I'm sitting on the floor of my oldest kid's room at 2 AM, folding a mountain of tiny mismatched socks, trying to figure out how to make baby number three's nursery look like one of those minimalist forest-fairy wonderlands you...
The Truth About Googoo Babies (And What Mine Are Actually Saying)
I’m currently elbow-deep in printing shipping labels for my Etsy shop while my youngest, Levi, is having what sounds like a very heated political debate with the ceiling fan. He’s six months old, completely pantsless, covered in what I hope...
What the Gisele Bundchen Baby News Taught Me About Over-40 Pregnancy
It was a Tuesday, I was wearing yoga pants with an unidentifiable yogurt stain on the left knee, standing in the aisle at Target staring blankly at diaper cream when three different people gave me completely contradicting advice about having...
Dear past me: What I wish I knew about raising happy Dutch babies
It's three in the morning and you're sitting on the edge of the glider in a freezing Chicago nursery. You're holding a screaming six-month-old who hasn't slept a solid stretch since he was born. You pull out your phone, desperate...