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What the Adriana Smith Baby Case Taught Me About ER Visits
It was 11:45 PM on a Tuesday, and I was standing at my kitchen island slapping shipping labels onto poly mailers for my Etsy shop while the baby monitor glowed next to my tape dispenser. I should have been sleeping,...
What a 1980s Movie Taught Me About Dads and Newborns
Dear Sarah from last October, You're currently sitting in the driver's seat of your Honda Odyssey in a Starbucks parking lot. You're wearing those black Lululemon leggings that have an unidentifiable crusty stain on the left thigh, clutching an iced...
Why I Tossed My Plastic Toys For A Wooden Spielbogen Baby Gym
It was 2:00 PM on a Tuesday, and I was sitting on my living room rug nursing a lukewarm coffee while a giant plastic jungle gym flashed neon green lights directly into my six-week-old's eyeballs. The thing was blaring some...
How the Peppa Pig New Baby Episode Saved My Sanity With Two Kids
I was sitting squarely on the cold bathroom tile, staring cross-eyed at two pink lines on a plastic stick, while my two-year-old was actively trying to flush my best Mac contour brush down the toilet. He paused his plumbing experiment,...
Why I'm Stealing Millie Bobby Brown's Top Secret Parenting Rule
I just spent forty-five minutes frantically deleting old Facebook albums from 2019 while my toddler tried to climb the dishwasher, and let me tell y'all, the panic sweat was real. I was looking at my oldest son's digital footprint, and...
Why I'm Searching For The 'I Had A Baby Without You Full Movie' At 3AM
It's 3:14 AM. The flat smells faintly of lavender baby lotion, stale coffee, and the specific brand of despair that only sets in when you've been awake since Tuesday. Twin A is currently using my left clavicle as a teething...
Finding The Right Baby Carrier Without Losing Your Mind
I'm standing next to our ridiculously tiny baby car in the pouring rain in a grocery store parking lot, crying over a twenty-foot piece of stretchy bamboo fabric. Leo is exactly four weeks old, screaming from the depths of his...
The Truth About Baby Shower Decorations (And That Balloon Arch)
I was thirty-two weeks pregnant with my oldest, sitting flat on my kitchen floor, and ugly-crying into a pile of deflated sage green balloons. My husband had just walked in from work, taken one look at me holding a dual-action...
Secrets Baby Beach Aruba: The Midnight Hotel Panic
It was 2:14 AM, and I was wearing a fleece bathrobe over a maternity bathing suit top because my four-month-old, Leo, had just spit up breastmilk all over my favorite oversized college tee. My husband Dave was snoring in the...