Magazine

A tired mother looking at a list of modern naming options for her daughter

The brutal reality of picking rare names for your daughter

I spent three years working the night shift on the maternity floor at Rush. You want to know the actual hardest part of the job. It wasn't the meconium blowouts or the frantic monitor alarms at two in the morning....

Read more

Dad looking confused in a party supply store aisle holding a pink tutu

How We Debugged Baby Girl Shower Themes Without Pink Glitter

I was holding a plastic tiara that smelled strongly of volatile organic compounds, staring down an aisle that looked like a flamingo had spontaneously combusted. My wife was twenty-nine weeks pregnant with our first baby, currently asleep in the passenger...

Read more

A tired mother sitting on a nursery floor holding a cup of coffee

What Nicole Kidman actually gets right about maternal burnout

Dear Priya from six months ago. You're currently sitting on the bathroom tiles at three in the morning. The radiator is making that hissing sound you hate. Your daughter just threw up milk on your only clean sweatpants, and you're...

Read more

Exhausted dad holding twin baby girls while looking at a name list

The Great 3AM Hunt for Baby Girl Names Starting With V

The glow of the laptop screen at three in the morning is a uniquely hostile type of light, especially when it’s illuminating a spreadsheet containing seventy-four potential names for a human being you haven't even met yet. Outside our London...

Read more

Bewildered dad looking at a spreadsheet of woodland nursery themes with coffee

The Algorithm for a Delayed Shower That Doesn't Suck

Dear Marcus from exactly six months ago. You're currently sitting at the kitchen island, staring at a Google Sheet titled Party_Logistics_V3.xlsx, while our five-month-old daughter aggressively chews on a silicone spatula. Since we moved to Portland at 38 weeks pregnant,...

Read more

Pregnant mother looking exhausted sitting near a pile of pink baby shower decorations

Surviving the pink tulle trap of modern girl baby showers

I was exactly twenty-eight weeks pregnant, sitting on the floor of my Chicago apartment, surrounded by three garbage bags of neon pink tulle. My mother-in-law had just left after proudly declaring my upcoming baby show would be a princess paradise....

Read more

Rihanna and A$AP Rocky with their newborn baby girl in a vintage styled photo

Rihanna And A$AP Rocky's New Girl: Let's Talk About Three Under Four

It was roughly two in the morning. I was sitting in the dark of my Chicago apartment, nursing a cold cup of chamomile tea while my toddler used my collarbone as a teething ring. I was doing that mindless, sleep-deprived...

Read more

Tired dad holding a teething baby while staring blankly at a list of names

Surviving the Minefield of Hispanic Baby Girl Names

The greatest lie they peddle in those glossy parenting magazines—usually the ones featuring a serene mother in white linen looking lovingly at a perfectly clean infant—is that picking a name for your child is a beautiful, intuitive process. They suggest...

Read more

Exhausted dad holding two babies while staring confused at a massive pink tulle tutu

Surviving the Frilly Nightmare of Cute Baby Girl Clothes

I'm currently standing in the disabled toilet of a Costa Coffee in Wandsworth, staring in abject horror at my daughter’s back. She is wearing a gift from a well-meaning great-aunt—a vintage-style, sage green dress featuring no fewer than fourteen microscopic...

Read more