Magazine

Close up of an 11-month-old baby smiling and showing newly erupted baby teeth

I Googled "Do Baby Teeth Have Roots" at 3 AM and Now I'm Terrified

It's exactly 3:14 AM, and my index finger is currently wedged inside my eleven-month-old's mouth. I'm conducting a blind tactical sweep of his lower gums because he has been waking up screaming every two hours, and I'm desperately trying to...

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Tired father looking at a baby monitor while twin toddlers chew on toys

Do Babies Sleep More When Teething? The Exhausting Truth

I was staring at the glowing green screen of the baby monitor at 2:14 PM on a Tuesday, completely paralyzed by a mixture of deep relief and mounting panic. Florence and Matilda had been asleep for two and a half...

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Baby in a 1970s style organic cotton bell-bottom outfit crawling on a living room rug

Dressing Your Infant in a Devil's Rejects Baby Firefly Costume

The single biggest myth in modern parenting is the delusion that your infant is a blank, cooperative canvas for your own deeply specific pop-culture obsessions. I discovered this entirely too late while trying to explain to a very judgmental woman...

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Exhausted mom in hospital bed staring at newborn baby yawning

So, Can Your Newborn Really Be Born With Teeth? (My Freakout)

The biggest, most universally accepted myth about giving birth is that you're going to be handed this perfect, squishy, entirely gummy little blob of a human. I fully believed this. I thought I had at least six solid months of...

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Toddler girl wearing a cloth baby doll carrier holding a stuffed bear

The Absolute Absurdity of the Baby Doll Carrier (And Why We Own Two)

My mother-in-law firmly believes that giving a two-year-old their own miniature baby wearing apparatus is mildly ridiculous and encourages them to grow up entirely too fast. The woman at our Tuesday morning playgroupβ€”who wears floor-length unbleached linen in the dead...

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Mom sitting on a nursery floor playing pretty little baby chords while baby watches

Why Learning Pretty Little Baby Chords Beats Playing Mozart

Three years ago, I was sitting on my cheap living room rug, sweating through my nursing tank top, frantically trying to sync a Bluetooth speaker to a twelve-hour Spotify playlist called "Mozart For Genius Brain Development." My oldest son, the...

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A stressed father looking at his hands while holding a baby

The Unexpected Hazard of Press-On Nails During the Baby Years

I was on my hands and knees in the living room, aggressively parting the fibres of our Berber rug like a forensic investigator looking for a microscopic weapon. Chloe, my sister-in-law, hovered above me near the sofa, clutching a lukewarm...

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Exhausted British dad reading a fantasy webtoon on his phone while holding twin babies in the dark.

Lord Baby Runs a Romance Fantasy With Cash 92 vs. My Twins

The digital clock on the nursery wall glared at me: 3:14 AM. The room smelled distinctly of stale Calpol and desperation. In the left cot, Evie was violently chewing the wooden bars like a tiny, furious beaver. In the right...

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A tired mom holding a coffee mug while her baby plays on a wooden play gym.

Why Chasing the Myth of the Unicorn Baby Nearly Ruined My First Year

It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was sitting on the floor of the nursery in a tragically stained Nirvana t-shirt that smelled heavily of sour milk and desperation. Maya was three months old, and she was screaming....

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