Dear Past Me: The Messy Truth About Waterproof and Plastic Bibs
Dear Sarah from six months ago, You're currently standing in the baby aisle of that ridiculously overpriced boutique downtown. Itβs exactly 10:15 AM on a Tuesday, and you're wearing those black lululemon leggings that definitely have a crusty yogurt stain...
The Big Secret About Baby Conditioner With No Alcohol Labels
I'm currently sitting on a damp bath mat that smells vaguely of mildew, squinting at the tiny print on a plastic bottle while my four-year-old tries to make a pirate beard out of toxic-looking blue bubbles. He is my oldest,...
Why I Completely Misjudged The Baby Shower Word Search As A Dad
I was sitting in a folding chair in our Portland backyard, balancing a paper plate of half-eaten potato salad on my knee, staring at a grid of 144 random letters on a piece of recycled cardstock. Across the yard, Sarah's...
How the Deko Babyparty Trend Saved Me From Pinterest Insanity
I was exactly thirty-six weeks pregnant with my oldest, Liam, standing on a wobbly dining room chair I definitely shouldn't have been on, trying to force a piece of cheap Scotch tape to hold up a massive, flimsy plastic banner...
The truth about motorisches spielzeug and your baby's brain
I was sitting on the living room rug with a butter knife. I was trying to pry the battery compartment open on a plastic singing avocado. The screw was stripped. The avocado was looping a song about the alphabet in...
The Baby Chick Temperature Chart (And Why I Stopped Checking It)
I was sitting on the edge of the guest bathtub at two in the morning, holding an infrared thermometer gun like a radar detector, pointing it directly at five day-old baby chicks huddled in a plastic storage tote. My wife...
The Great Baby Girl Wallpaper Debug: A Dad's Guide to Nursery Decor
I'm standing on a step stool at 11 PM with a plastic putty knife in my hand, frantically trying to scrape a semi-congealed layer of industrial adhesive off the drywall before it permanently bonds. My wife Sarah is standing in...
Debugging The Baby's Breath Garland Nursery Disaster
It's 11:43 PM on a Tuesday, and I'm standing on a step stool in my socks, gripping a heavy-duty staple gun in one hand and a crumbling, foul-smelling botanical structure in the other. My 11-month-old son is asleep in the...
Why navigating baby shower chair rentals nearly broke my spirit
It was pouring with rain, naturally, because this is London, and I was wedged firmly between our Victorian front doorframe and a fifty-seven-inch-tall wicker peacock chair. My wife, Sarah, who was approximately eight hundred months pregnant with the twins at...