Magazine

A dad holding his 11-month-old baby while looking at a Minecraft village on a computer screen.

The Real Truth About How To Make Baby Villagers Grow Faster

Last Tuesday at 3:14 AM, the ambient temperature in my living room was exactly 68.4 degrees, I was running on four hours of deeply fragmented sleep, and I was aggressively throwing virtual carrots at a digital infant. I was desperately...

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Exhausted mom looking confused at a smartphone screen while folding laundry

Why Super Creek Goo Goo Babies Isn't The Parenting Trend You Think

I was elbow-deep in a basket of mismatched toddler socks yesterday, trying to figure out how a house with five people produces seventy-three single left socks, when my fourteen-year-old nephew snorted from the couch. He was supposed to be helping...

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Exhausted dad holding twin girls next to ruined DIY milestone outfits

Taylor Swift Baby: Surviving Pop Culture With Twins

I was quite literally elbow-deep in silver sequins and non-toxic fabric glue at a quarter to eleven on a Tuesday night when my wife casually dropped the magazine on the kitchen island. The headline was screaming about the latest Travis...

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Toddler watching an animated movie on the couch in pajamas

Why The Boss Baby Movie Is A Brutally Accurate Medical Drama

It was six in the evening. The Chicago wind was doing that thing where it aggressively rattles the windowpanes just to remind you that going outside is a terrible idea. My toddler was sitting on my knee, methodically crushing a...

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Dad inspecting his baby's mouth for white patches of oral thrush

Is That Milk Or Thrush? A Dad’s Guide To The White Tongue Panic

My mother-in-law told me it was just leftover milk and to leave it alone. The triage nurse on the pediatric hotline asked if my wife's nipples felt like they were on fire. A guy on a Portland dads' subreddit told...

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An exhausted British dad holding a crying newborn baby with a tongue tie.

The Messy Reality of a Tongue Tie Baby: A Dad's Survival Guide

The first time someone suggested our daughter's mouth was structurally defective, we were sitting in a sweltering hospital side-room smelling faintly of industrial bleach and desperation. We received exactly three pieces of conflicting advice within a single twenty-four-hour period, which...

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Exhausted dad figuring out the correct medication dosage for his sick baby at night.

Tylenol for Babies: What I Wish I Knew Before the 3 AM Fever Spike

Dear Marcus from six months ago. You're currently standing barefoot on the cold hardwood floor of the nursery at 3:17 AM. You're holding a sticky plastic syringe filled with an unnervingly bright purple liquid. Your wife is gently rocking a...

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Sleep-deprived dad holding a baby in an oversized wrap bodysuit

System Failure at 3 AM: HM Baby Clothes and Newborn Survival

The poop had somehow achieved terminal velocity. It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and my two-week-old daughter was lying on her changing pad, screaming with the piercing intensity of a malfunctioning smoke detector. The payload had defied all known...

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Tired dad holding a teething baby while staring blankly at a list of names

Surviving the Minefield of Hispanic Baby Girl Names

The greatest lie they peddle in those glossy parenting magazinesβ€”usually the ones featuring a serene mother in white linen looking lovingly at a perfectly clean infantβ€”is that picking a name for your child is a beautiful, intuitive process. They suggest...

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