The truth about surviving winter with a toddler in a chunky sweater
The wind off Lake Michigan was doing that thing where it physically hurts your face, and I was losing a wrestling match with a five-point harness. My son was wearing this massive, beautiful, hand-knit chunky sweater his Dadi had mailed...
The Muddy Puddle And My Kinderwagen Schlafsack Revelation
It's a Tuesday in late November, featuring that specific type of aggressive, sideways London drizzle that somehow bypasses your coat entirely and settles directly into your bones. I'm standing on the cracked pavement outside our flat, trying to negotiate with...
The Honest Truth About Newborn Short Sleeve Onesies And Blowouts
My oldest son, Hunterβbless his heart, he was my practice childβwas exactly four days old when he projectile vomited partially digested breastmilk directly into the hood of a tiny, forty-five-dollar bear-eared sweater my great-aunt bought him. I remember standing in...
The Case For The Black Baby Onesie And Retaining Your Sanity
At 2:14 PM on a damp Tuesday, exactly three weeks into fatherhood, I found myself trying to extract a screaming infant from a pair of miniature, stiff denim jeans. Florence (or maybe Mabel, the sleep deprivation had completely blurred their...
The Engineering of Baby Fall Clothes: A Portland Dad's Guide
7:14 AM. The air in our Portland backyard smells like wet pine needles and coffee. It's exactly 48 degrees outside, but the weather app promises it'll hit a balmy 71 by three o'clock. I'm standing on the porch staring at...
Why a Womens Ringer Tee is Actually Medical Grade Mom Gear
I was scraping dried sweet potato off my shoulder with a lukewarm baby wipe when I finally accepted the truth about maternal fashion. The internet feeds us this massive, glittering lie that modern motherhood requires a closet full of high-tech,...
Why Traditional Toddler Rompers Are Actually A Complete Nightmare
I'm balancing my lukewarm iced vanilla latte on the edge of the incredibly questionable diaper changing station in the Target family restroom while my then two-and-a-half-year-old, Maya, is doing the frantic, knee-knocking pee dance. She is wearing this absolutely precious,...
The huge family blanket mistake we made (and what actually works)
It's exactly 3:14 AM and I'm sitting in the dark nursery wearing sweatpants that haven't been washed since Tuesday and a faded Nirvana t-shirt that smells vaguely of sour milk, stale coffee, and total desperation. Maya is maybe seven months...
The Great Infant Romper Lie And What Actually Keeps Babies Cool
I was standing in the emergency room triage bay during a brutal Chicago heatwave when I realized most parents have no idea how to dress a child. The smell of antiseptic was giving me a headache. A frantic mother carried...