Magazine

Exhausted dad staring at a massive pile of wet wipes in a messy London nursery

A letter to my past self about the quest for superior baby wipes

Dear Tom of six months ago, You're currently standing in the semi-darkness of the nursery at 4:12 AM, attempting to perform a minor miracle while Twin A tries to kick you in the face and Twin B wails in aggressive...

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Tired dad googling the best sleeping position for baby with stuffy nose while his infant sleeps flat on their back.

The Best Sleeping Position For Baby With Stuffy Nose Resolved

It was 3:14 AM, the cool-mist humidifier was blasting enough vapor to make the nursery look like a 90s music video, and my eleven-month-old sounded exactly like a broken espresso machine. Every inhale was a wet, whistling rattle. Every exhale...

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Exhausted dad holding a cup of tea while looking at maternity dresses

The Ultimate Blue Baby Shower Dress Survival Guide for Dads

I was standing in our shoebox-sized London bedroom, knee-deep in crinkled ASOS packaging, watching my heavily pregnant wife attempt to extract herself from what can only be described as a sapphire-coloured sausage casing. She was breathing heavily, one arm pinned...

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A tired dad holding a baby looking confused at a television screen

What Bridget Jones’s Baby Got Wrong About Real Parenting

Don't, under any circumstances, boot up Bridget Jones’s Baby at 11 PM on a Tuesday when your wife is 34 weeks pregnant and already convinced every random abdominal twinge is a catastrophic system failure. I learned this the hard way....

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A tired dad staring at a laptop spreadsheet of baby names in a dark nursery

Reverse-Engineering Adorable: The Baby Name Spreadsheet

It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, roughly two weeks before our son's scheduled launch date. The only light in the half-finished nursery was the cold glow of my dual monitors. My wife, Sarah, was sitting on a deflated birthing...

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A dad holding a baby shower card looking deeply confused in a nursery

How to Write a Baby Shower Card Without Sounding Delusional

I'm standing in the card aisle of the local Tesco, holding a pastel-yellow envelope and aggressively crossing out a pre-printed poem about 'tiny toes and heavenly woes' with a biro. The cashier is staring at me. I don't care. I'm...

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Confused dad checking baby rash on face while holding a smartphone in a dark nursery

Troubleshooting Baby Rash: A Dad’s Guide to Infant Skin Bugs

It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday when the flashlight from my iPhone illuminated my 11-month-old's cheek, revealing a topographic map of angry red bumps that definitely weren't there at bedtime. My wife was asleep. The baby was surprisingly chill....

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Exhausted mom looking at a mountain of scattered infant gear in her living room

The Brutal Truth About Baby Products From A Tired Nurse

It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday. I was sitting on my Chicago apartment floor surrounded by thirty-two cardboard boxes of varying sizes, smelling vaguely of spit-up and fenugreek. My son was three weeks old and screaming in that specific...

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A chubby baby sleeping in a baby pen next to a plush penguin

What A Giant Baby Penguin Taught Me About Raising Kids

It was 3:14 AM. I know this because my eyes were burning from the glare of my phone screen, and I was pinned to the rocking chair by my six-month-old, who currently possesses the density and general shape of a...

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