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motherhoodnew bornparenthoodparenting humourrelationshipssurvival
Exhausted mom holding a newborn in a sustainable Kianao bodysuit

Reclaiming The Title Of Baby Mama And Surviving Year One

My wife is asleep next to me, emitting a low, rhythmic wheeze that means she’s currently in deep REM, and I'm sitting in the dark, furiously scrolling through a Wikipedia rabbit hole about billionaires. I literally caught myself googling how...

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Tired mother looking down at a staring newborn baby on a playmat

Waiting For The First Real Smile Without Losing Your Mind

It was three in the morning during a brutal Chicago February, and the radiator in our apartment was making that rhythmic hissing sound. I was holding my son after a feed, staring at his squished face in the dim light...

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Tired dad in a messy Portland apartment holding a baby wearing an organic cotton bodysuit while staring at a laptop.

The "Baby Daddy" Firmware Update: What I Actually Know Now

3:14 AM. I'm standing in our kitchen illuminated only by the microwave clock, holding a lukewarm bottle of formula, and staring at a Google Sheet I built to track our son's diaper output. The rows are color-coded by consistency. My...

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Tired dad looking at a baby monitor screen in a dark Portland nursery

Debugging the erratic hardware of your newborn's respiratory system

My mother-in-law confidently told me that if the nursery is completely quiet, the baby is sleeping perfectly and I should go make a sandwich. My lead developer at work, however, told me that I needed to purchase a hospital-grade under-mattress...

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A tired but smiling solo parent holding a baby while drinking coffee

"I had a baby without you": The messy truth of solo parenting

The biggest myth about doing this alone is that it looks absolutely anything like the cinema. People type i had a baby without you full movie into their search bars late at night, expecting some sweeping romantic drama starring an...

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A tired dad holding a wooden baby gym while staring blankly at a tablet screen

The Baby John Phenomenon: Decoding Screen Time & Newborn Life

"Just put on that little animated kid, it's basically a mute button for crying," my lead engineer told me over Slack while I bounced a screaming infant on my knee. "If he looks at a screen before he's two, his...

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Baby in an organic cotton bodysuit kicking in a wooden floor bouncer

What I Got Completely Wrong About My First Baby Bouncer Seat

It was a Tuesday at like, 2 PM, and I was sitting on the damp bath mat in my tiny apartment bathroom, wearing a stained gray nursing bra and exactly one sock. Leo was three and a half weeks old....

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Sleep deprived mom staring at a mechanical baby swing in a dark living room

What I Wish I Knew Before Buying That Magical Baby Swing

It’s 3:14 AM on a Tuesday in November, and I'm standing in my kitchen wearing a pair of Target maternity leggings from 2014 that smell aggressively like sour milk, holding a lukewarm mug of yesterday’s coffee, just absolutely paralyzed while...

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Priya reviewing a list of baby names scribbled on a hospital notepad

The brutal truth about picking baby names that won't ruin them

My mother-in-law cornered me in the kitchen at twenty weeks pregnant to gently suggest that our child's name needed to reflect our deep ancestral roots. Later that afternoon, my hipster neighbor in Logan Square casually mentioned over the fence that...

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