Look Outside Rat Baby: When Your Kid's Google Search Gets Real
Last Tuesday, I was standing over my farmhouse sink, aggressively scraping crusty oatmeal off a plastic toddler plate with my thumbnail, when I happened to glance at the family iPad sitting on the counter. The browser was open to a...
Sweet Baby Inc Detected? Why Parents Are Panicking Over Nothing
I was standing in my kitchen at 6:45 AM on a Tuesday, wearing those embarrassing grey college sweatpants with the bleach stain on the thigh, holding my third cup of coffee. My phone buzzed with a text from my sister,...
The Sweet Baby Inc Panic: Why I Thought Our Nursery Was Compromised
I was sitting cross-legged on the floor of the nursery at 3:14 AM, frantically scanning the back of an organic lotion bottle with my phone flashlight, convinced I had somehow introduced a catastrophic vulnerability into our household infrastructure. My eleven-month-old...
My confusing search for a talented baby squirrel in Portland
My 11-month-old was actively attempting to ingest a handful of premium Portland moss when my phone vibrated in my pocket. We were doing our mandatory morning yard time, which mostly consists of me following him around like a poorly programmed...
What The Lana Rhoades Baby Drama Taught Me About Online Privacy
I was sitting on the cold hexagon tiles of my downstairs bathroom at 2:14 AM, the blue light of my phone illuminating a weird stain on my sweatpants that I was aggressively pretending was just yogurt. Leo was four months...
The kriss_baby monitor panic and why your nursery needs a digital d...
The green light on the nursery camera was blinking out of sync with the router. It's a tiny detail, but when you spend your days working pediatric triage, you get highly attuned to the rhythm of blinking lights. In the...
My 3 AM Deep Dive Into the Island Boy Baby TikTok Drama
My phone brightness was turned down to one percent, but it still felt like staring into the sun. It was 3:17 AM. My 11-month-old son was asleep on my chest, entirely dead weight, snoring faintly with his mouth hanging open....
What A Million Dollar Baby Actually Costs (And Sounds Like)
Traffic on Lake Shore Drive is at a dead stop. My toddler is aggressively kicking the back of my seat in perfect time to the bass thumping from the radio. It's that Tommy Richman track. You know the one. Before...
The trey coolin baby boo trend: digital safety for your infant
The blue light from my phone was throwing weird, sharp shadows against the nursery wall. It was 3 AM. My son was finally asleep on my chest after a four-hour teething marathon that left us both smelling like sour milk...