Magazine

Pregnant mom setting up a baby shower venue table with organic cotton blankets and wooden toys

Searching for Baby Shower Venues Near Me Without Going Broke

I was exactly twenty-nine weeks pregnant with my oldest, sweating entirely through a polyester maternity dress in the lobby of a local country club that smelled heavily of floor wax and old money. The event coordinator, bless her heart, was...

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Pregnant mom sitting on couch surrounded by blank baby shower thank you cards and gifts

Writing Baby Shower Thank You Cards Without Losing Your Mind

I was exactly thirty-six weeks pregnant with my oldest, sitting dead center on the faux-wood floor of our tiny rental duplex, surrounded by seventy-five pastel blue envelopes. I was absolutely sobbing. My lower back felt like it was splitting in...

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Marcus staring at a slow cooker of meatballs while holding a digital thermometer.

Dear Past Marcus: Debugging the Baby Shower Meatballs Crisis

I've got a digital meat thermometer plunged into the geometric center of a frozen sphere of ground turkey, and the reading is hopelessly stuck at 138Β°F. It's 11:30 PM on a Friday. The kitchen smells like a confusing collision of...

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A half-addressed baby shower invite sitting next to a spilled cup of lukewarm coffee.

The Honest Truth About Baby Shower Invites (And Surviving Them)

I was sitting at my kitchen island in July of 2017, my ankles swollen to the exact size and texture of grapefruits, wearing a maternity tank top that had a crusty mustard stain on the hem, crying over cardstock. Literally...

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A pile of organic cotton baby blankets next to a wooden toy

The End of Humiliating Baby Shower Games (And What to Do Instead)

Five years ago, I stood in a drafty village hall in Surrey, holding a plastic cup of warm sparkling wine, watching my sister-in-law unwrap a massive ball of clingfilm while wearing a blindfold. Someone shoved a disposable nappy under my...

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A dad holding a baby shower card looking deeply confused in a nursery

How to Write a Baby Shower Card Without Sounding Delusional

I'm standing in the card aisle of the local Tesco, holding a pastel-yellow envelope and aggressively crossing out a pre-printed poem about 'tiny toes and heavenly woes' with a biro. The cashier is staring at me. I don't care. I'm...

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Sarah holding a giant iced coffee looking terrified in the middle of a crowded baby convention center.

Surviving a Massive Baby Show Without Losing Your Damn Mind

I'm standing in aisle 400 of the convention center, seven months pregnant with Maya, sweating through a maternity shirt that was absolutely not designed for indoor arena temperatures, while my husband Dave is holding three different neon tote bags filled...

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A stack of open baby shower cards resting on an organic cotton baby blanket

Writing baby shower wishes that will not make parents roll their eyes

I'm sitting cross-legged on my faded Chicago apartment rug right now. My toddler is methodically dismantling a cardboard box in the corner, looking for a stale Cheerio I know he dropped three days ago. I'm holding a stack of heavy...

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A heavily scrutinised spread of baby shower food on a buffet table.

How to Serve Baby Shower Food Without Poisoning the Mother

There's a pervasive, Pinterest-fueled lie that catering a baby shower is an exercise in elegant pastel minimalism involving delicate cucumber sandwiches and unbothered women laughing in sunlit rooms. It's actually a high-stakes hostage negotiation with bacteria where one wrong slice...

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