How My Eleven-Month-Old Gained Root Access to Our Entire House
There was a spoon flying toward my left eye before I'd even managed to fully process that the coffee maker was empty. I ducked, the metal clattered against the stainless steel fridge, and my eleven-month-old son glared at me from...
Letter to My Past Self: Surviving Twin Girls and a Baby Cat
Dear Tom. You're currently standing in the kitchen at 4:13 AM holding a half-empty bottle of Calpol, shivering in your dressing gown, and staring at a tiny, bewildered creature that your wife just brought home in a cardboard box. You...
The Mobile Sleep Unit: What I Got Wrong About Baby Transport
The rain is coming down sideways in the Trader Joe's parking lot, and I'm standing next to the open trunk of my Subaru, violently jiggling the folding mechanism of a twelve-hundred-dollar rolling chassis while my eleven-month-old screams from the backseat...
The Absurd Truth About The Baby Camel Trend Invading London
I was standing in a fiercely over-lit organic grocer in Hackney at 7:15 in the morning, holding a squirming toddler under one arm like a bag of wet cement, when I saw it. A tiny, violently expensive glass bottle labeled...
Dear Me: Surviving a Baby Brown Recluse Spider Scare in the Nursery
Dear Sarah from six months ago. You're currently standing in the laundry room at 2:14 AM wearing a milk-stained inside-out nursing tank and one sock. You're holding Maya's tiny pink shoe under the blinding fluorescent light, squinting at a squished...
The Midnight Baby Broccoli Incident And How We Survived
2:14 AM. Thatβs exactly when the smell hit me. It wasnβt a dirty diaper, though heaven knows I checked with the flashlight on my phone while trying not to wake my husband. It was this creeping, sulfurous cloud rising from...
My Honest Journey to Finding the Best Baby Bottle Sterilizer
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was standing over a pot of rolling boiling water with a pair of metal kitchen tongs, desperately trying to fish out a pump flange before it melted to the bottom of...
A Baby Born In Portland: My Complete First-Time Dad Meltdown
The thermostat in Room 314 of the maternity ward was locked at exactly 68 degrees, but I was sweating through my gray hoodie like I was pushing a critical database update to production at 2 AM with no backup. My...
Dear Past Priya: The Ugly Truth About Buying Baby Boots
Dear Priya from last November. You're currently wedged between the radiator and the front door of our Chicago apartment, sweating completely through your shirt. You're trying to wrestle a screaming nine-month-old into a tiny fleece snowsuit while staring at a...