The Uncanny Valley of the CGI Baby in Squid Game
There's a massive misconception floating around the parenting subreddits right now. People seem to think the horrifyingly fake infant in that Korean dystopian show was just a product of lazy budgeting. They assume some producer looked at an Excel sheet,...
Dear Past Me: The Great Clash Royale Dragon Emote Code Chaos
Dear Sarah of Last October, You're currently standing in the kitchen in those gray Lululemon leggingsβthe ones with the mysterious bleach stain on the left thigh that you keep swearing you'll throw away but never do. It's, like, 6:43 AM...
What To Do When The Baby Zombie Phase Actually Ruins Your Sleep
Listen. It was a quarter past three on a Tuesday when I realized my apartment was under a coordinated siege by two entirely different types of the undead. My husband and my older kid were huddled over an iPad in...
The Truth About Those Evo Baby Dragon Decks Everyone Is Playing
I was sitting on the living room rug yesterday, knee-deep in a mountain of mismatched toddler socks, when I got three completely different pieces of advice about the exact same problem. My mom called and told me boys just naturally...
How to Nail a Baby Luigi Look Without Toxic Polyester Crap
I was sitting on the sticky laminate floor of our hallway at 4 PM on a Tuesday, drinking aggressively room-temperature coffee out of a chipped mug, trying to peel my screaming six-month-old out of a licensed character costume. The biggest...
I panic-googled Roblox pill babies at 2 AM so you do not have to
I was sitting on my brotherβs couch in southeast Portland last Sunday, desperately trying to keep my squirming 11-month-old from eating a suspicious clump of golden retriever hair, when my nine-year-old nephew yelled into his gaming headset: "Bro, grab the...
Why a Roblox Baby Search Terrified Me Out of Digital Parenting
It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, and my 11-month-old daughter was systematically attempting to pry the escape key off my mechanical keyboard while I desperately searched for a digital distraction. I just needed ten minutes of peace to drink...
The Silksong Crying Infant Noise Explained For Exhausted Parents
It's 2:14 AM. I'm standing in the hallway in my boxer briefs, holding a lukewarm bottle of formula, desperately trying to isolate the audio source of a shrieking infant. The problem? Our actual eleven-month-old son is fast asleep in his...