When Can You Feel Baby Move? The Real Truth About First Kicks
I was seventeen weeks pregnant with my oldest, sitting in my Chevy Tahoe in the Target parking lot, aggressively jabbing myself in the stomach with two fingers. An app on my phone, which I really shouldn't have trusted to begin...
The Honest Truth About When Do Babies Laugh (And Why I Stopped Trying)
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was standing in the middle of the nursery wearing a milk-stained nursing bra and sweatpants I hadn’t washed in a week, making aggressive, high-pitched monkey noises at my three-week-old son, Leo....
Figuring Out the Baby Booster Meaning Before You Lose Your Mind
It was 8:14 on a Tuesday morning, I was wearing my husband Dave's faded college sweatshirt that smelled faintly of stale Cheerios, and my third cup of coffee was already cold. I was sitting at the kitchen island filling out...
Dear Past Sarah: What I Wish I Knew About The Entire Bear Phase
Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago. You're currently sitting on the cold, slightly sticky linoleum of the downstairs bathroom, hiding from your own family. It’s, like, 9 AM on a Tuesday, and you're wearing those gray sweatpants with the...
Dear Past Me: The Truth About Aquaphor Baby and Drool Rashes
You're standing in aisle fourteen of the Target on Roosevelt Road, holding a tub of regular healing ointment in your left hand and the infant version in your right. It's two in the morning. Your daughter is at home with...
To Past Me: Losing Sleep Over That 7 Month Old Baby Kidnapped Update
You're sitting in the rocker right now, the wood creaking on that one lopsided floorboard in the nursery, clutching a cold cup of coffee from yesterday while the baby finally sleeps on your chest. The glowing screen of your phone...
The reality of a six month old baby and the sweet potato incident
I fed my son his first sweet potato puree while wearing a cream cashmere sweater. That was my first mistake. My second mistake was letting him hold the spoon. Within three seconds, he sneezed, and my kitchen looked like a...
Surviving The Sleep Sack Baby Phase Without Losing Your Mind
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, or maybe Wednesday, because time doesn't actually exist when you've a newborn. I was wearing a faded sorority t-shirt from 2008 that had a mysterious, crusty spit-up stain on the shoulder, and I...
Debugging The Complete System Failure Of Dressing A Baby Boy
I'm currently staring at a pair of dark wash, rigid denim jeans in size 9-12 months. My son is actively executing a perfect alligator death roll on the changing pad, and I'm supposed to somehow force his chaotic, rapidly expanding...