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Surviving the Dress Code: A Messy Guide to Baby Shower Guest Outfits
When my cousin got pregnant last spring, I texted three different people asking what the hell I was supposed to wear to her backyard celebration, and the responses were honestly useless. My mother-in-law told me I needed a pastel sheath...
Why I Regret (And Still Love) Buying Baby Blue Jordans For My Kid
It was Tuesday, 2:14 PM, and the sun was absolutely baking the squishy rubber flooring at Centennial Park. I was wearing leggings that hadn't seen the inside of a washing machine since Sunday and an oversized Nirvana tee with a...
Why the baby pink hex code is a total scam for your nursery
I was standing in the middle of the paint aisle at a home improvement store, thirty-eight weeks pregnant and sweating through my maternity leggings. I held forty-two different swatch cards that all claimed to be the definitive pastel blush. My...
The Honest Truth About Putting Tiny Ugg Boots on Your Infant
I was standing in the slush outside a Starbucks in 2018, clutching my third iced latte of the morning because uninterrupted sleep was a literal myth, staring down at my six-month-old son's foot. Or rather, his empty foot. Leo was...
The Miniature CEO: Why I Stopped Dressing My Baby Like a Tiny Adult
I was exactly four and a half minutes into trying to button a miniature, tailored tweed blazer onto my squirming 11-month-old when I realized my entire approach to parenting apparel was fundamentally flawed. He was doing that terrifying back-arching maneuver,...
Dear Past Me: What I Wish I Knew Before Buying Nike Baby Shoes
Dear Tom from six months ago, You're currently standing in the pouring rain outside a shop window in Covent Garden, staring at a pair of miniature high-tops while your twin daughters attempt to dismantle the rain cover of their Bugaboo...
Why your baby hangers are ruining perfectly good clothes
Tuesday, 3 AM. The vomit reached his elbows. I stripped him down in the dark, wiping him with a cold wet wipe because hospital triage rules apply when bodily fluids breach the sleep sack. I reached into the closet for...
Sachin and Babi: Why I Finally Stopped Buying Cheap Event Dresses
I was locked in a sweltering utility closet at my cousin's wedding in East Texas, wrestling a static-cling polyester wrap dress off my milk-leaking chest while my oldest, bless his heart, methodically smeared wedding cake icing onto my only good...
Dear Tom: The truth about the long sleeve bubble romper
Dear Tom of six months ago, You're currently sweating through your t-shirt in the narrow hallway of our flat, desperately trying to wedge Twin Aβs voluminous, balloon-shaped bottom half into a pair of slim-fit corduroy trousers. She is screaming. You're...