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Comparing human twin growth to the staggering reality of baby elephant weight

Twins and the absurd reality of baby elephant weight

In the suffocatingly warm waiting room of our local NHS clinic, whilst desperately trying to balance a screaming twin on each knee, I received three entirely contradictory pieces of advice about infant growth within a single ten-minute span. Our health...

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1-month-oldbaby developmentbaby weightfourth trimestermillennialmotherhood
Exhausted mom looking at a digital scale next to a sleeping newborn in a blue polar bear blanket.

Stop Crying Over Baby Weight: A Letter to My Sleep-Deprived Self

Dear Jess from six months ago, I see you. You're standing barefoot in the master bathroom at 3 AM. You're completely naked, holding a screaming, naked infant. You step on the cold digital scale, squinting in the dark to read...

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A tired dad staring in disbelief at an NHS red baby book while twins crawl away

Normal Baby Weight at Birth: A Letter to My Terrified Past Self

Dear Tom from six months ago. You're currently hiding in the downstairs loo at a family barbecue, trying to field questions from your brother-in-law about what constitutes a normal baby weight. His wife is being induced on Tuesday, and you're...

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A tired father staring blankly at a digital baby weighing scale on a table.

A Letter to Past Me: Stop Panicking About Normal Baby Weight

Dear Tom from two years ago, currently sweating through a grey marl t-shirt in Room 4 of the local NHS clinic. You're sitting in a plastic chair that's somehow both sticky and cold, balancing two identical infant car seats on...

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baby weightinfant caremental healthnewbornparenting anxiety
A frustrated dad staring at a digital infant scale next to a stack of nappies

The baby scale anxiety trap (and why we threw ours out)

It's 4:12 AM on a Tuesday, and I'm standing in the kitchen illuminated only by the aggressive blue backlight of an LCD screen, trying to calculate the relative density of a soiled nappy. I'm staring at an Excel spreadsheet that...

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12-month-oldbaby weightgrowthparenting anxietypediatrician
A dad looking stressed at a pediatrician office holding a baby

Why I Stopped Treating My Baby's Weight Percentile Like a High Score

The crinkly paper on the exam table was already soaked with drool by the time Dr. Miller walked in holding the printout. I was bouncing our eleven-month-old on my hip, trying to keep him from disassembling the otoscope on the...

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A very chunky newborn sleeping peacefully in a stretchy organic cotton bodysuit.

Am I Really Having The Biggest Baby Ever Born? My Honest Take

There I was at 38 weeks pregnant, standing in line at the local H-E-B just praying my water wouldn't break near the seasonal aisle, when the cashier took one look at my belly and told me I needed to stop...

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6-month-oldbaby weightearly developmentinfant healthmotheringparenthood
Mother looking stressed while holding her infant on a digital bathroom scale

Why That Online Growth Chart Is Making You Lose Your Mind

I'm standing naked on my cold Chicago bathroom tile at four in the morning. My baby is also naked. I step onto the digital scale, memorize my exact weight, step off, pick up my thrashing three-month-old, step back on, and...

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Sarah drinking lukewarm coffee while looking stressed at a baby weight chart printout.

Dear Past Me: Please Stop Stressing Over the Baby Weight Chart

I was cleaning out my messy Google Drive about 6 months ago—looking for a recipe I never ended up making—and I found a draft of a letter I had started writing to my past self. I was looking at old...

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