Magazine
When Can Babies Have Juice: The 3 AM Apple Juice Disaster
It was 2:14 AM on a random Tuesday, and I was sitting cross-legged on the cold linoleum of my kitchen floor staring blindly at the humming refrigerator. I was wearing a maternity tank top that I'm pretty sure had three-day-old...
The Great Upright Wobble: A Guide to Your Baby Sitting Solo
I remember the exact Tuesday I tried to engineer my twin girls into a seated position using an architectural configuration of nursing pillows that would have made a civil engineer weep. I was absolutely convinced that if I just propped...
The 3 AM Monitor Panic: Surviving The Stomach Sleeping Phase
The glowing screen of the baby monitor was blinding in the pitch-black bedroom, and my heart was hammering against my ribs at roughly 140 beats per minute. It was 3:14 AM. The temperature in the nursery was exactly 69.4 degrees,...
The Great Eye Colour Waiting Game: A London Dad's Guide to Melanin
My mother-in-law leaned over the Moses basket on day three and declared with absolute certainty that Twin B's eyes were definitely turning brown because she spotted some microscopic muddy flecks near the pupil. The NHS health visitor popped round on...
When Do Babies Get Measles Vaccine? A Portland Dad's Guide
I was sitting in Dr. Lin's examination room with a color-coded spreadsheet printed on actual paper, which should tell you everything about my mental state at the time. My daughter was six months old, we were exactly three weeks out...
The Unvarnished Truth About Your Infant's Shifting Eye Colour
Dear Tom from eighteen months ago. You're currently sitting on the floor of the nursery at three in the morning, holding an iPhone torch uncomfortably close to Maya's face to see if her irises have developed any gold flecks, while...
When Do Babies Finally Learn To Hold Their Own Bottle?
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was wearing a stained College of Charleston t-shirt that smelled heavily of sour milk and sheer exhaustion. Leo, who was about five months old at the time, was doing this infuriating...
When Do Babies Roll: A First-Time Dad's Guide to the Midnight Flip
2:14 AM. The baby monitor is glowing like a radioactive brick on my nightstand. I'm staring at a grayscale pixel blob that's supposed to be my four-month-old daughter, except instead of lying flat on her back like a compliant little...
When Do Babies Roll From Back to Belly
The monitor glowed like a radioactive potato on my nightstand at 3:14 AM. Usually, my son was a static lump of swaddled cotton, entirely predictable in his lack of mobility. Tonight, the lump was gone, replaced by a flat, face-down...