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The Hilarious and Messy Truth About Raising a Cute Anime Baby
I was standing in my kitchen at two in the morning, aggressively peeling a sweaty, bright yellow, 100% polyester Pikachu costume off my screaming eight-month-old while the ending theme of some intense action show blared from the living room TV....
Is A Baby Gold Bracelet Safe? My 3AM Troubleshooting Guide
Maya's mom arrived from Chicago at 7:14 PM, exactly twelve minutes after we finally managed to shut down the baby's waking cycle. She dropped her bags in the hallway and immediately handed me a velvet box that weighed absolutely nothing....
Surprise, You Now Have a Dozen Hamsters (Surviving the Litter)
"Momma, Princess Fluffbutt split into tiny pink jellybeans!" That was how my four-year-old announced we were suddenly harboring fugitives on a Tuesday morning while I was elbow-deep in packing tape for my Etsy shop and trying to keep the baby...
Why we really need to talk about the ugly side of baby headbands
You pull it out of the tissue paper at your baby shower. It's a stiff nylon elastic band attached to a sequined peony the size of a small cabbage. The aunties in the room coo over it, telling you how...
Confessions: Why a Plastic Bag is a Terrible Baby Keepsake Box
I'm currently sitting cross-legged on a heavily stained rug at two in the morning, holding a small, crinkled ziplock bag that looks suspiciously like evidence from a low-budget crime scene. Inside is a tiny, pale wisp of hair. I know,...
Why I Swallowed My Pride and Bought Himalaya Dolphin Baby Yarn
I was sitting on the cold linoleum of my laundry roomβwhich doubles as the shipping department for my tiny Etsy shopβstaring at an $80 pile of imported raw wool that had just turned my oldest sonβs neck into a patchy,...
The Truth About Babys Breath Flowers in Your Newborns Nursery
Dear Priya from six months ago. You're standing in the craft store floral aisle, heavily pregnant, holding a thirty-dollar bundle of dried white weeds. You're convinced this is the final touch your nursery needs to tie the whole woodland aesthetic...
Surviving the Absolute Chaos of Your First Real Baby's Out Day
I'm currently standing in the hallway holding a solitary, incredibly tiny sock. I've been standing here staring at the wallpaper for what feels like twelve minutes, entirely paralysed by indecision. I can hear one of my two-year-old twin daughters crying...
Debugging The Drool Firmware: When Do Babies Teeth Come In?
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and the Portland rain was actively mocking my sanity by drumming a steady, chaotic beat against the bedroom window. The baby, who usually just gives a polite little squawk when he wants milk,...