Magazine

A sleep deprived mom holding a glass baby bottle in a dark nursery.

How to Choose a Baby Bottle Warmer Without Losing Your Mind

I distinctly remember standing in my kitchen at 3:14 AM with my oldest kid screaming his lungs out in the other room. I was staring bleary-eyed at a frozen bag of breastmilk, listening to the hum of the refrigerator, and...

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Exhausted dad staring at a medicine bottle at 2 AM while holding a crying baby who feels like a tiny furnace.

Why That 81mg Baby Aspirin Bottle Is A Massive Parenting Trap

The digital clock on the microwave read 2:14 AM, the Portland rain was actively trying to dissolve our roof, and my 11-month-old son felt exactly like a MacBook Pro rendering 4K video on your bare legs. I was frantically bouncing...

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A sleeping baby in a crib demonstrating a safe babies only sleep environment

The babies only survival guide for the newborn trenches

Listen. You're standing in the hospital parking lot, staring at a seven-pound human strapped into a car seat that looks like a NASA prototype, and you're realizing the discharge nurse actually let you leave. They just wheeled you out and...

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A nice dinner table setup with a subtle clothing protector folded next to a plate

Finding the Best Adult Bibs for Dignity at the Dinner Table

The gravy hit her white silk blouse before I even had a chance to drop my fork. I'm sitting there at Sunday dinner, wedged between a screaming toddler and my grandmother, watching a massive brown stain spread right across her...

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Confused dad pushing a stroller through a retail store aisle

I Survived the Buybuy Baby Relaunch (And My Wife's Registry List)

I was sitting in the driver's seat of my Honda Civic last Tuesday, blinking stupidly at a massive blue and white sign in a New Jersey strip mall, completely convinced I had slipped into an alternate timeline. My wife, Sarah,...

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A tired dad holding his newborn baby near a window

My kid turned into a highlighter (and other early release bugs)

It was day three of parenthood, and I was holding my naked son up to a rain-streaked Portland window like Rafiki presenting Simba, convinced that forty-five seconds of overcast Pacific Northwest UV radiation would magically fix his liver. My wife,...

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Stressed mom holding a baby in a hospital waiting room drinking coffee

Surviving Your First Baby Xray Without Completely Losing Your Mind

It was a Tuesday at 9 AM, and I was sitting in a freezing radiology waiting room wearing yesterday’s leggings and a nursing bra that smelled faintly of sour milk. I was staring blankly at a poster of a cartoon...

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Nervous dad looking at a blurry 2D infant sonogram screen in a dark clinic room

Baby Ultrasound Expectations vs. Reality: A Nervous Dad's Guide

The worst Tuesday of my entire life started in a strip mall between a discount vape shop and a dry cleaner that smelled aggressively like harsh chemicals. My wife, Sarah, was 28 weeks pregnant, and her sister had gifted us...

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A confused dad looking at his phone while an 11-month-old baby plays on a wooden gym.

The Baby Ruth Conundrum: Candy Hazards & Expert Parenting Truths

Last Tuesday, my mother casually suggested I rub some whiskey on my 11-month-old's swollen gums and hand him a chunk of a baby ruth candy bar to chew on while I made dinner. Two hours later, my neighborβ€”a veteran dad...

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