Searching For A Plug In Baby: The Truth About Newborn Soothing
It was Tuesday, somewhere around 3:14 AM, and I was standing in the middle of our dark nursery wearing my husband Daveβs stained college sweatpants, smelling entirely like sour milk and absolute defeat. Leo was two weeks old and he...
The Night I Dropped a Pill (And How We Survive Meds Now)
I was wearing my husband Danβs threadbare college lacrosse t-shirt, it was 2:14 in the morning, and I was on my hands and knees with my iPhone flashlight in my mouth, frantically sweeping the kitchen floor with my bare hands....
What the Patrick Mahomes Baby Taught Me About Surviving Three
Dear Jess from six months ago. You're currently sitting on the floor of our laundry room, crying over a mountain of unmatched tiny socks while your two toddlers use your Etsy shipping boxes as a literal wrestling ring in the...
My Papoose Baby Era: How I Survived The Clingy Newborn Phase
2:14 AM. A Tuesday in mid-November. I was standing in the middle of our tiny galley kitchen wearing a pair of maternity leggings that smelled vaguely of spit-up and stale coffee, desperately trying to wrap fifteen feet of gray stretchy...
A Late-Night Letter to Myself Before Baby Number Three Arrives
I see you sitting there in the dark. It's 2:14 AM, your giant eight-months-pregnant belly is hopelessly wedged into the armrests of the nursery glider, and the blue light from your phone screen is illuminating the tired bags under your...
The Brutally Honest Truth About the Orbit Baby Stroller System
It was raining, obviously. I was standing in the parking lot of the Trader Joeβs on 4th Street, wearing yoga pants that hadnβt actually seen a yoga mat since sometime in 2017. Maya was strapped into her car seat screaming...
Orbit Baby G5 Stroller: A Letter to My Exhausted Past Self
Dear Priya from six months ago. You're currently standing in the Jewel-Osco parking lot on Southport. The wind is doing that thing where it physically hurts your face. Your C-section incision feels like it's unzipping, and you're contorting your spine...
Oh My Little Baby Boy: Demolishing The Tough Infant Myth Today
I was in the middle of wrestling a mustard-yellow blowout off my six-month-old when my great-aunt patted my shoulder and told me I was coddling him. He was sobbing because he was cold and covered in his own waste. I...
What I Wish I Knew About Oatmeal Baths Before Destroying Our Tub
Dear Jess of six months ago: you're currently standing over the hall bathroom tub with a metal kitchen strainer, crying while trying to fish soggy, bloated breakfast oats out of the drain before your husband realizes you've destroyed the plumbing...