Why We Looked For Angel Baby Lyrics After Our World Stopped
Iβm sitting in our Subaru outside the Fred Meyer on West Burnside, and the wipers are on the lowest setting, squeaking against the windshield every four seconds. My wife is staring blankly at the dashboard clock. In my hand, I've...
Why the All Day Baby Phase Will Break You and Rebuild You
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was staring at a half-eaten cold Pop-Tart while swaying aggressively in the dark. My oldest, who's now five and a walking cautionary tale for why we don't negotiate with terrorists, was...
The Absolute Mess Of Buying Baby Gear (And What Actually Works)
It was 2017. November. A Tuesday, I think, and raining completely sideways. I was exactly thirty-two weeks pregnant with Maya, my second kid, and I was sitting completely cross-legged on the cold linoleum floor of aisle four at BuyBuyBaby (RIP...
The 3 AM pediatric nurse guide to surviving baby gas relief
The radiator is hissing in our Chicago apartment and my phone says it's 3:14 in the morning. My infant son is currently executing a flawless crunchy-frog maneuver on the changing table. His knees are pinned tight to his chest. His...
January Newborn Survival: Forget the Baby Garnet Birthstone Myths
It's three in the morning and you're holding a screaming two-week-old in a freezing, dark room. You type something stupid into your phone because you're desperately trying to figure out if your January newborn's stubbornness is astrological. You search for...
How I Built a Baby First Aid Kit Without Losing My Damn Mind
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and my 11-month-old son felt like a tiny, screaming space heater. I was frantically tearing apart our master bathroom cabinet, tossing aside half-empty bottles of adult cough syrup, stale melatonin gummies, and a...
Decoding the 3 AM Baby Grunting Sounds Without Losing Your Mind
I'm standing barefoot on the cold Portland hardwood at 3:14 AM, holding my phone flashlight at a weird angle so I don't accidentally blind my daughter, just waiting for her to make the noise again. Don't do this. Seriously, whatever...
Building A Survival Baby Hamper For The 3 AM Meltdowns
It's exactly 3:14 AM on a Tuesday. Maya is four days old, and she's screaming with the intensity of a tiny, furious dinosaur. I'm standing in our dark kitchen wearing nothing but mesh hospital underwear and a nursing bra that...
Why we really need to talk about the ugly side of baby headbands
You pull it out of the tissue paper at your baby shower. It's a stiff nylon elastic band attached to a sequined peony the size of a small cabbage. The aunties in the room coo over it, telling you how...